As “South Park” approaches its 23rd anniversary, this legendary adult cartoon remains a goldmine for unforgettable quotes. Known for its edgy humor and shock factor, the antics of its child characters are definitely not for kids. Here’s a collection of some of the most side-splitting quotes from Cartman, Stan, Kyle, Kenny, and the gang. Get ready to chuckle!
- “I’m a police officer, and you’d better respect my authoritah!” – Eric
- Stan: “Oh no, they’ve taken Kenny out!”
Kyle: “You bastards!” - “Don’t you dare call me a Cartman!” – Stan
- “Lying is bad for you, Stan. It’ll make you sterile.” – Mr. Thompson
- “I’m not overweight, I’m just wonderfully plump.” – Eric
- “Drugs are not good, mmkay?” – Mr. Smith
- “All animals kill. The only ones who don’t are dumb like cows and turtles.” – Kyle
- “As you age, you’ll find that breasts become a big part of your life. But don’t let that interfere with your friendships. Friends are forever, while boobs are just boobs.” – Ron
- “Screw you guys, I’m going home!” – Eric
- “In Mexico, everything is allowed. It’s the American way!” – Jim
- “When a girl says ‘we need to talk,’ it’s time to start punching yourself in the balls, dude.” – Eric
- “Human Shield operation? Please.” – Chef
- Kyle: “You’re late, Eric.”
Eric: “I had to bike here, my behind is killing me.”
Kyle: “Your behind?”
Eric: “I have to say behind or I get shocked for saying ‘butt.’” - “Hippies are everywhere. They want to save the planet but just end up smoking pot and smelling terrible.” – Eric
- “I apologize, Wendy, but I just can’t trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn’t die!” – Mr. Thompson
- “Eric couldn’t tell a rainforest from a Pop-Tart.” – Stan
- “Kenny’s family is so poor, they had to put their cardboard box up for a second mortgage yesterday.” – Eric
- “Parents only get offended by TV because they use it as a babysitter and the main educator for their kids.” – Kyle
- Muffled “F***!” – Kenny
- “To find quality friends, you have to wade through a lot of dicks first.” – Eric
- “If parents spent less time worrying about what their kids watch on TV and more time on their actual lives, the world would improve drastically.” – Stan
- “We must stop wasting money! Instead of paying for cable, let’s watch clouds! Instead of buying clothes, wear bed sheets! Only spend on essentials: water, bread, and margaritas!” – Ron
- Wendy: “Dude, dolphins are smart and friendly.”
Eric: “Smart and friendly on rye bread with mayonnaise.” - “Kids, don’t do drugs. There’s a time and place for everything – that’s called college.” – Chef
- “Everyone from Jersey just humps and punches each other.” – Stan
- “Don’t you know the first law of physics? Anything fun costs at least eight bucks.” – Eric
- Eric: “You seem a little cranky, Kyle. Got some sand in your vagina?”
Kyle: “There’s no sand in my vagina!” - “Well, I peeked in my mom’s closet and saw what I’m getting for Christmas: an UltraVibe Pleasure 2000.” – Eric
- “That’s incorrect, Eric. Don’t worry though; there are no stupid answers, just stupid people.” – Mr. Thompson
- “I haven’t had time to feel secure in myself.” – Satan
- Stan: “Oh my god, they killed Kenny!”
(silence) Kyle: “What? I’m not talking to you!”
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In summary, “South Park” continues to entertain with its witty quotes and outrageous humor. From the antics of Cartman to the wisdom of Stan and Kyle, these characters have given us countless memorable lines that resonate far beyond the screen.
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