As a relatively new mom, I’m still navigating the wild world of parenting, barely approaching the five-year milestone. Yet, my social media feeds suggest that some parenting practices are almost universal, and humorously enough, one of those practices is bending the truth to our kids.
Parents tell a variety of fibs for reasons that run the gamut from harmless to a little sketchy. But let’s take a look at some of the most common fabrications we dish out to our little ones.
1. We have eyes in the back of our heads.
I can’t say if this is a universal truth among parents, but I know my relatives have mentioned it more than once. It’s as if they had some supernatural ability to know when I was up to no good.
2. This food is too hot for you, sweetie!
Kids have a knack for wanting everything that’s on your plate. How many times have we told a little white lie about our food being too spicy or too hot for them? Raises both hands
3. Santa Claus
Let’s face it, the Santa myth is likely the most well-known parenting tale of all time. Growing up, I never saw any gifts from Santa, leading me to question his existence. Or maybe my grandmother just had a very strict gift-giving policy.
4. If you sneeze with your eyes open, they’ll pop out.
My dad, a master of jokes, told me this story about a professor who supposedly sneezed with his eyes open and lost one. I still have no intention of testing that theory.
5. Going outside with wet hair will make you sick.
Old wives’ tales have a way of sticking around, especially the one about wet hair causing colds. Even if it’s not true, I avoid going out with wet hair because, let’s be honest, it’s just uncomfortable.
6. Strangers are the biggest threat.
While it’s understandable to caution kids about strangers given the world we live in, it’s interesting to note that many strangers can actually be quite friendly. Sometimes, they’re nicer than those we already know.
7. Turning on the light in the car at night brings bad luck.
I still hesitate to turn on the light in the car after dark. I wonder if this lie stems from concern about the driver’s focus. Either way, I’m not about to test it!
8. Too much screen time will ruin your eyesight.
I grew up hearing that watching too much TV could harm my vision. While it may be a stretch, who wants to risk a headache from sitting too close to the screen?
9. Swallowing gum means it’ll take seven years to digest.
I remember friends who swallowed gum and were petrified by the thought of it sitting in their stomachs for years. Despite knowing it’s a myth, I still steer clear of swallowing gum.
10. You can do whatever you want when you’re an adult.
Did anyone else’s parents imply that adulthood was a ticket to freedom? I often heard, “You can do whatever you want once you’re out of my house.” Spoiler alert: it comes with responsibilities and bills, not just fun.
11. If you keep rolling your eyes, they’ll get stuck.
As a ’90s kid, rolling my eyes was an art form. Some adult once warned me that I could get them stuck in the back of my head. I didn’t buy it, but maybe I should have considered the headache it can bring.
12. Swimming right after eating will give you cramps.
Growing up, I was always told to wait before swimming after a meal. I spent little time around pools, but now I know there’s no real danger. Still, exercising right after eating? No thanks.
As I prepare for my own parenting journey, I realize that these little lies sometimes help us manage chaos or keep our kids safe. Here’s to many years of parenting—complete with its necessary fibs!
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In summary, parenting often involves a few well-intentioned lies, helping us navigate the complexities of raising children. These tales may be amusing, but they serve a purpose, offering a reprieve from the chaos and helping to protect our little ones.
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