Yes, men change diapers! And they deserve a clean, safe place to do it while out with their little ones. But have you ever considered how the absence of changing tables in men’s restrooms affects women?
Recently, my partner, Mark, and I were dining out with our kids and another family. With three toddlers in diapers, it was only a matter of time before someone needed changing. Mark was closest to our daughter when her moment came, so he grabbed the diaper bag and headed to the restroom. It seemed like he barely left the table before he was returning.
This scenario is becoming all too familiar. It’s not that Mark is exceptionally speedy—there simply was no changing table in the men’s room. As a result, I had to take our daughter to the women’s restroom, once again.
On January 1, 2019, New York City implemented a law mandating that all new and renovated public buildings with restrooms for men include changing tables. Other cities are following suit, which is fantastic (and frankly overdue). After the NYC law was enacted, many articles praised this change, emphasizing that fathers need a clean space to change their children’s diapers. I wholeheartedly agree, but that’s not the only issue at stake.
This situation impacts women too, particularly mothers. It shocked me that few articles addressed how the lack of changing tables in men’s restrooms affects women. Society often places the primary caregiving role on women, regardless of their preferences. When changing tables are exclusive to women’s restrooms, it reinforces the notion that mothers should bear the responsibility for diaper changes, leaving them to navigate public restrooms with squirming babies while their families wait.
Recently, a photo went viral showing a mother missing out on a birthday celebration because she was preoccupied with her baby. The observer noted that no one stepped in to let her enjoy the gathering, highlighting society’s tendency to overlook the invisible labor mothers perform. This lack of recognition contributes to postpartum depression. It’s essential for families and friends to offer support and help mothers feel included.
So, while I appreciate the progress made in recognizing that fathers need changing tables, it’s disheartening that the focus is predominantly on men’s needs. What about the needs of mothers? What about their need for support? Shouldn’t we also advocate for a society that acknowledges both parents as equal caregivers?
As we strive to address postpartum depression, we must also think about prevention. We should be working alongside women to alleviate some of the burdens of childcare.
After that dinner, I reached out to the restaurant manager to inquire about plans to install a changing table in the men’s restroom. I plan to make this request each time I encounter this issue. Change happens when we voice our needs and challenge the status quo. Men have started the conversation; now it’s time for women to join in. Rest assured, this mother’s voice will not go unheard.
We are united by motherhood, but we are also partners, daughters, sisters, and friends needing spaces to discuss more than just parenting. For more insightful discussions, check out our Home Insemination Kit’s engaging blog posts, and if you’re interested in home insemination topics, visit this authoritative resource.
In summary, every men’s restroom should have changing tables, not only to support fathers but also to ease the burden on mothers. We must advocate for equal parental responsibilities and create a society that recognizes the contributions of both parents.
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