“Are you really going to hold that baby all day?”
“Aren’t you worried about spoiling him?”
“Teach him to self-soothe now, or you’ll regret it later.”
These are just a few of the unsolicited comments I received when my little ones were newborns. Yes, you read that right—this wasn’t just from strangers but also from family and even pediatricians. It’s hard to believe that people questioned my instinct to hold my babies constantly, even when they were just hours old.
Now that my kids are 4 and 9, I look back and chuckle at those absurd remarks. They grow up so fast that I often find myself pleading for a cuddle, something that used to happen all day every day. At that time, though, every piece of advice weighed heavy on me.
Holding my babies wasn’t merely a preference; it was essential. If I set them down, they would cry their little hearts out. Sure, I could have let them cry it out and maybe they would have figured out how to self-soothe, but every fiber of my being told me to pick them up. I listened to my instincts, even when faced with judgmental stares.
Guess what? My instincts were spot on. Babies genuinely need to be held when they cry—not just because they’re adorable and snuggly, but because it’s crucial for their development. Research supports the idea that you absolutely cannot spoil a baby. In fact, holding them is vital for their health.
A recent study published in Pediatrics explored the long-term benefits of skin-to-skin contact with premature infants. The research revealed that those who received this care had significantly higher IQs, larger brain areas, and even higher salaries as adults compared to those who didn’t experience skin-to-skin contact. The benefits extended beyond intelligence; those babies displayed less hyperactivity and aggression in school and had fewer absences.
While this study focused on preemies, similar findings exist for full-term infants. A 2012 study by the Cochrane Pregnancy and Childbirth Group indicated that full-term babies who experienced skin-to-skin care had better respiratory stability, higher breastfeeding rates, and cried less overall.
But it’s not just about the early days. Holding your baby also has lasting positive effects. Research shows that snuggling significantly enhances their comfort and feeding abilities in the weeks following birth. If you’re dealing with a fussy or colicky baby (raises hand!), you’ll be relieved to know that carrying your baby can alleviate those symptoms.
Need more convincing? Holding your baby during painful procedures, like vaccinations, can lessen their pain, too! It’s also essential for building a strong bond between parents and their little ones.
For those who love diving into scientific details, Dr. Marissa Lee’s article in the Newborn and Infant Nursing Reviews explains that infant brains undergo critical development in those first few months. The amygdala, responsible for emotional learning and memory, matures significantly during this time, and skin-to-skin contact plays a vital role in that process.
Whew! There’s a lot of science behind this, and I could go on and on. The bottom line is there’s no way you can spoil a baby by holding them. In fact, the opposite is true; neglecting to hold your baby enough can have negative consequences on their health and development.
I often wish I could go back and arm myself with all this research when faced with criticism for keeping my babies close. But I think most new moms, like me, were too exhausted to argue or even look up this data.
Thankfully, most mothers have a strong instinct that tells them their baby belongs in their arms. If you find yourself doubting, just know that scientific evidence is readily available. If you want to learn more about the process of home insemination, check out this informative resource on pregnancy and insurance.
So next time someone questions your parenting style, don’t hesitate to flash them your best “resting mom face,” grab your baby, and keep doing what feels right.
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Summary
In conclusion, trust your instincts when it comes to holding your baby. Research supports that you cannot spoil a baby through affection, and doing so has numerous health benefits. So, embrace the cuddles and ignore the critics—your baby’s development depends on it.
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