Updated: Oct. 1, 2023
Originally Published: Sep. 27, 2023
It may seem unbelievable, but there are moments when I lose sight of the fact that my son, Jake, is facing cancer.
I certainly remember that he navigates his world using a wheelchair, a gait trainer, or by scooting along the floor because he cannot stand or walk independently. I recall how he communicates through a mix of grunts, gestures, one-handed signs, and a specialized device since he is unable to speak. I am aware of the gastrostomy tube that provides him with essential medications, nutrition, and hydration, as eating food could lead to pneumonia—a risk he faces due to his brain injury. He also avoids liquids altogether.
I always pack a bag filled with fans, cooling towels, and sun hats for summer outings, as well as hand warmers, blankets, and warm coats for winter, due to Jake’s inability to regulate his body temperature.
What sometimes slips my mind, however, is the fact that cancer is the second leading cause of death among children, following accidents. I take his daily routine—medications for seizures and other conditions, the use of a nebulizer to clear his lungs, and the nightly CPAP machine with supplemental oxygen—into account because these are part of our everyday life.
Yet, I sometimes forget that the radiation oncologist warned us about a 50% chance of Jake’s brain tumor returning. I forget that every two minutes, a child receives a cancer diagnosis, and 12% of those children will not survive. I also overlook the harrowing statistic that 60% of childhood cancer survivors may face long-term health effects.
I forget how different childhood cancers are from those in adults and how only 4% of the federal cancer research budget is allocated to pediatric cancer research.
In truth, I sometimes lose sight of how fortunate we are. We can embrace Jake, bask in the familiar scent of his hair, sing “Baby Shark” on repeat, and read him stories—simple joys that many parents of sick children are denied.
I don’t forget these realities because they don’t matter; rather, I momentarily push them aside because the weight of such thoughts can be unbearable. It’s a challenge to carry this sadness daily.
Every September, I reawaken to these truths during Childhood Cancer Awareness Month, and I urge everyone to do the same.
Please, share this message. If you can spare a dollar, consider donating to any of the incredible pediatric cancer organizations out there—my favorites include St. Baldrick’s and Alex’s Lemonade Stand, but all of them do vital work! Most importantly, cherish your children, hold them tight, and express gratitude. You never know when you might become a parent of a child with cancer.
If you’re interested in family planning, check out this excellent resource on IVF or explore more about at-home insemination methods like the CryoBaby and BabyMaker kits.
In summary, while the realities of cancer can often be overwhelming, we must strive to focus on the love and joy in our lives, even amid the struggle.
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