We’re all familiar with ghosting—the act of vanishing from someone’s life without a trace. Whether you’ve been on the receiving end or have ghosted someone yourself, it’s a painful experience that can leave anyone feeling abandoned. And just when we thought things couldn’t get worse, along comes ‘soft ghosting’—the milder, yet still soul-crushing version of the phenomenon.
Soft ghosting is like ghosting-light. The person still reacts to your messages, offering a thumbs up or a “like,” but they don’t engage in meaningful conversation. You’re left with a string of unanswered texts, and any follow-up feels awkward as you’re left wondering why their enthusiasm has suddenly diminished. It’s frustrating, and make no mistake, it’s still a form of ghosting.
Any variation of ghosting can sting, leaving you without closure and filled with self-doubt. Sometimes, you can see it coming, and you might even mutually agree to ghost each other. But soft ghosting sneaks up on you, especially in dating scenarios. Just when you think you’re vibing with someone, they start responding with nothing more than emojis, leaving you with a million questions about what went wrong.
Chantal Heide, a dating coach, explains that our modern communication methods have impacted how we navigate relationships. In the digital age, it’s easy to avoid direct rejection. Often, if you don’t move a conversation off the app, it’s as if it never existed. This makes soft ghosting a convenient way to avoid uncomfortable conversations.
Many people find it hard to be honest and express disinterest, especially when they get along with someone. After experiencing the dating scene, I’ve been both the ghost and the ghosted. It’s disappointing, but honestly, it’s become an expected part of dating.
Imagine you’re chatting with someone who seems great, but then you realize they’re not quite what you want. Instead of explaining your feelings, you might just react to their texts with a thumbs up and leave it at that. This is soft ghosting in action—an easy way to exit a relationship that feels unfulfilling.
Candice Montgomery shared her thoughts on the matter, saying, “I just don’t have the spoons to walk someone who has been very insistent (and kind too) through an easy let down.” It’s a classic case of pain avoidance, where soft ghosting feels like a gentler alternative to outright ghosting. At least the ghoster acknowledges you, even if their response is frustratingly minimal.
While it’s preferable to have an honest conversation, soft ghosting might be the least painful way to communicate a lack of interest, particularly for those who find confrontation daunting. Kat Rutkin, a non-profit director, voiced her concerns about the emotional toll of managing everyone’s feelings.
Yet soft ghosting still leaves you in limbo. You may find yourself wondering if the person is genuinely busy or if they’re simply avoiding you. This uncertainty can be just as painful as outright ghosting, especially when you’ve invested time in building a connection. As Freyja Brooks pointed out, “They reacted. They saw. And they chose to cut the line.”
In the end, navigating relationships—especially in the digital age—can be incredibly complex. Clear communication is key, and while soft ghosting may seem like an easier route, it often leaves everyone involved feeling uneasy.
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In summary, while soft ghosting might feel like a softer blow compared to traditional ghosting, it can still leave emotional scars. Clear, honest communication is always the best route in any relationship.
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