In my hometown—a small, tight-knit community in the Midwest—everyone is connected in some way. It’s a place where churches genuinely commit to outreach programs, and I truly appreciate that dedication. However, there’s a trend among some church leaders that I find troubling.
Every summer, as the back-to-school season approaches, an event is organized to assist low- and middle-income families with school supplies, clothing, and other essentials. Activities like games, face painting, and giveaways make it a joyful occasion. But what tarnishes this goodwill is the way some individuals choose to broadcast these acts of kindness on social media, complete with identifiable photos and captions that expose the families’ hardships to the world.
While I support sharing inspiring stories of generosity, using someone’s struggles as a means to boost your own image is unacceptable. It’s disheartening to see vulnerable individuals turned into mere props for self-aggrandizement. When someone reaches out for help, they are already humbling themselves; there’s no need for further humiliation by showcasing their plight online.
Let’s remember the importance of privacy and dignity. Instead of posting about our charitable deeds, we should strive to help others quietly, without the need for public acknowledgment. The reality is that those who genuinely wish to assist others should do so with respect for their humanity. Families grappling with financial hardships face enough challenges without having their situations displayed for public scrutiny.
Too often, it’s those who are least familiar with true struggle who engage in this behavior, seeking praise while forgetting the very people they aim to uplift. It infuriates me to see these photos, not just because of the act itself, but because it transforms genuine kindness into a spectacle.
The urgency for immediate validation has overshadowed the essence of altruism. It seems our society has reached a point where good deeds require an audience, as if they hold little value without external approval. The desire for instant recognition can be disheartening.
Here’s a better approach: perform acts of kindness in private. If we truly want to help those in need, we must recognize that they deserve respect and dignity just like everyone else. Parents who can’t afford school supplies are still human beings who wish for better circumstances. Families enduring tough times during holidays long for relief, and they experience embarrassment and shame that can be exacerbated by public exposure.
We should take pride in knowing that we can positively impact a life without needing photographic evidence to validate our actions. It should be enough to know that a child can walk into school with new shoes or that a family can afford groceries for the month.
Times are tough, and many are struggling, but they are still entitled to their privacy. They are real people with emotions, just like you and I. No one is immune to hardship, and we are all just a job loss or personal crisis away from being in their shoes.
By giving in silence, our acts of kindness flourish. So, let’s focus on uplifting others without the need for social media applause. Stop claiming your heart is in the right place when your actions are driven by a desire for recognition.
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In summary, let’s shift our mindset from seeking validation to genuinely helping others. True kindness should be about the recipient, not the giver’s desire for praise.

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