By: Ashanti Morgan
Updated: Dec. 10, 2019
Originally Published: Dec. 6, 2019
When news of Gabrielle Union’s departure from America’s Got Talent surfaced, it shocked many. She is a beloved judge, after all. However, as the underlying reasons for her exit came to light, I found myself nodding in agreement with the unfortunate reality: Black women frequently encounter backlash for asserting themselves. When we voice our concerns, we’re often labeled as “difficult.” This is a long-standing issue, and it’s encouraging to see it gaining traction in conversations today.
For those unfamiliar, Union was dismissed after highlighting instances of racism on the AGT set and requesting Simon Cowell to refrain from smoking indoors—a practice that is illegal. His status as a wealthy white man allowed him to sidestep scrutiny. Additionally, Union faced criticism regarding her natural hair. Such instances of “casual” racism in a professional setting are far from trivial. Union was not being a “difficult” woman; she was advocating against racism.
My Experience in the Workplace
Years ago, I worked as a receptionist at a prominent upscale hair salon. I was the only Black woman in my role, and only one other Black woman held a management position. From the moment I started, I poured my heart and soul into my work. I believed in the salon’s mission, often prioritizing it over my mental well-being.
It didn’t take long for me to realize that the qualities that made me proud—my friendliness and willingness to assist—were perceived as “difficult” by upper management. The salon’s ethos was clear: “the customer is always right,” even at the expense of employee dignity. Many clients exhibited a sense of entitlement, and I never expected to be labeled difficult for refusing to tolerate disrespect. In my view, I was simply fulfilling my responsibilities.
I engaged in numerous discussions with my supervisors about the appalling treatment from both customers and management. Despite our collective hard work, progress was elusive. When I inquired about promotions, I was told I wasn’t “friendly” enough. The colleagues who were promoted were often those who smiled through abuse, asking for more while sacrificing their self-respect. My commitment to maintaining my values became a barrier to my advancement. If that means I’m “difficult,” so be it.
Despite my reservations, I continued to pursue a promotion, exhausting myself to meet their standards. I provided my personal number to clients for service-related issues and even assisted coworkers during my days off. My efforts left me drained and stressed, yet I remained labeled as difficult—especially after a coworker reported a customer’s complaint against me.
After a year and a half of dedication, I was terminated under the guise of “excessive lateness.” Deep down, I knew the real reason: difficult woman strikes again.
The Broader Implications
While a single high-profile actress being deemed difficult may not change the world, it does shine a light on an ongoing issue. Gabrielle Union brings visibility to a struggle that many of us face. For the record, I recognize that part of why I was labeled difficult was my race. It was seldom stated outright, yet the implications were clear. Throughout my tenure, Black women rarely lasted long in the company, likely due to our candid discussions about the challenges we faced.
This isn’t just an isolated incident—it’s a manifestation of systemic racism that persists. To this day, I feel a knot in my stomach when passing by that salon.
I firmly believe Gabrielle Union’s account of her experiences with AGT. Since my departure, I have hesitated to speak openly about what I endured, worried that my words would go unheard. Many Black women share this sentiment, knowing that our stories are often dismissed.
In recent years, there has been a movement to “believe Black women” and listen to our experiences. However, many professional Black women will attest that this ideal often falls short. Support wanes when we share uncomfortable truths; suddenly, we’re labeled as angry or difficult. There’s a distinction between being difficult and advocating for justice.
The support surrounding Gabrielle Union is promising. While her public profile undoubtedly amplifies her story, I hope it leads to meaningful discussions and growth. Will this awareness extend to everyday Black women in the workforce? I wish to remain optimistic, but I’m also grounded in reality.
One famous actress’s unjust firing won’t solve the systemic issues we face, but it may encourage recognition of our struggles. Gabrielle Union represents a long-overdue conversation, and one day I hope to see a genuine commitment to believing and valuing Black women.
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Summary
Gabrielle Union’s firing from AGT highlights the challenges Black women face when they assert themselves in professional settings. Like many others, I experienced backlash for advocating for myself in a previous job. This systemic issue reflects broader societal norms that often label assertive Black women as “difficult.” While Union’s story may not resolve these issues, it brings critical attention to the need for genuine acknowledgment of Black women’s experiences.
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