A while back, my partner received a message on social media from someone he had never met. After a little investigation, we discovered he was a member of the same large community church. Despite never having exchanged words, this man felt compelled to reach out with a message that read:
“Hello, I wanted to check in and see if you might need assistance discussing your wife’s health goals. As a nutrition and fitness coach, I would love to help you figure out how to guide her towards better movement and eating habits.”
This so-called “coach” was actually promoting an MLM weight-loss program that cost hundreds of dollars a month.
In hindsight, I wish we had given him the response he deserved, but at that moment, I was still transitioning from self-criticism to body acceptance. I lacked the confidence and assertiveness I possess now. Instead, we chose not to respond. I asked my partner to delete the message, and I avoided this man at church whenever possible.
His message left me confused and furious. I always made an effort to look my best at church—dressing stylishly, ensuring my hair was neat, and applying flawless makeup. Sundays were my time to shine, even while managing family responsibilities.
Yet, this stranger assumed that despite my efforts, my partner must be dissatisfied with my appearance and needed help to approach the topic of weight loss? I can assure you, Mr. Unwanted Messenger, if he had genuine concerns for my health, he would communicate them directly to me. My appearance is not a problem for my partner; he appreciates me just as I am.
What kind of nonsense is this? The same nonsense that individuals in larger bodies face daily. Unsolicited messages from strangers about body transformation through weight loss are a common occurrence. People presume we are eager to change because, who would want to live like this?
This relentless pressure is particularly intense for new mothers. When women are fresh out of the hospital, trying to navigate showering and sleep deprivation, some MLM wellness promoters have taken it upon themselves to target these moms, offering “support” to lose weight, “bounce back,” or conceal stretch marks.
If you think this behavior isn’t harmful, let me clarify: it absolutely is.
This predatory marketing tactic preys on vulnerable individuals and exploits their insecurities for profit. It’s unacceptable. If you doubt the seriousness of this issue, check out this insightful post that highlights real experiences. It’s worth your time to read.
In that post, you can find examples of moms targeted for weight loss while recovering from surgery, former “coaches” admitting to the encouragement of these tactics, and reps snapping pictures of strangers to use in their marketing strategies. The post is filled with abusive behaviors and frustrated individuals just trying to live their lives without constant harassment.
Can we not let people exist peacefully? Just recently, an acquaintance sent me the twelfth message over two years, despite my repeated polite refusals. It’s as if he senses that I’m about to have a baby, and in his mind, that means I’m primed for his unregulated weight loss program.
Clearly, he hasn’t listened to a word I’ve said about my stance against diet culture. I’ve spent the last two years building a healthy relationship with my body. I approach healthcare professionals with confidence and prioritize nourishing my body. I’m not thin, but I feel great.
And, by the way, I’m currently nine months pregnant! Do I want to shed some weight? Absolutely—specifically the weight of this baby and maybe a bit of the fluid in my ankles. But I don’t need a “wellness coach” for that; I’ll rely on my OB for guidance.
After countless polite refusals, I finally told him that I have cultivated a healthy and happy relationship with my body and will not be a client for him—now or ever. I explained that focusing on weight loss would compromise my mental health. I subsequently removed him from my social media because mutual acquaintances do not justify ongoing disrespect.
This isn’t an indictment against MLMs as a whole; I have several kitchen tools from home parties that I adore. But I strongly oppose the way some individuals exploit their business ventures to make vulnerable new mothers feel inadequate.
If someone in a larger body or a new mother wants your products or services, they know where to find you. Unless we reach out for assistance, can you please refrain from intruding?
For further insights on navigating motherhood and fertility, consider exploring this resource on female infertility. It offers valuable information for those of us on this journey.
In summary, targeting new moms with unsolicited weight loss offers is a damaging form of cyber-bullying that exploits vulnerabilities. We must advocate for the right to exist without pressure to conform to societal beauty standards.
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