Recently, my children came home from school with a flyer for a 1920s-themed auction and dance. As I was poring over the details, my eldest daughter exclaimed, “Mom, you really shouldn’t go to that.” Confused, I asked her why, and she replied, “Because that image is cultural appropriation.” She was referring to a clip art depiction of a flapper girl. I was taken aback and asked her to elaborate. She pointed out the feathers. Indeed, the flapper girl’s stylish ensemble included a sequin headband adorned with feathers.
I took the opportunity to explain that the flapper girl wasn’t an example of cultural appropriation—a term we had recently explored together when discussing some Kansas City Chiefs fans sporting feathered headdresses and face paint during a tomahawk chant. I felt a sense of pride knowing my daughter was learning about important contemporary racial terms that could facilitate deeper conversations.
As a white mother of black children, our family dynamics have opened the door to engaging discussions about race more than some others might experience. We often attract curious glances or comments about our multiracial family. Sometimes, it’s a stranger insisting that they don’t see color after approaching us due to our contrasting appearances. Other times, I find white women asking my daughters about their cornrows, remarking with wide eyes, “How long did that take? I could never sit still for hours!”
I’m grateful that we’ve developed a vocabulary that allows us to articulate our feelings. With this language, we can engage more meaningfully with others who approach our family. However, it’s not just families like ours who benefit from embracing these terms. The more individuals—both adults and children—grasp and utilize this language, the better off we all are. After all, avoiding conversations about race has led us nowhere.
White Privilege
Let’s address this head-on: if you identify as white, you possess white privilege. This concept refers to the societal advantages that accompany being perceived as the norm in the United States. It encompasses “a set of unearned assets” that a white person can rely on daily, often without even realizing it.
I can share countless personal experiences illustrating white privilege. For instance, as a white woman, I can walk through a store with a reusable bag, filling it without fear of scrutiny. In contrast, my children, because of their skin color, face suspicion simply for existing.
Colorblindness
Let me be clear: the idea of racial colorblindness is a myth. (And yes, I understand that it can be a medical condition for some.) This notion—that claiming to not see race equates to being free of racism—is fundamentally flawed. Ignoring my children’s race means dismissing a key part of their identity. They cannot detach from their blackness. Asserting we’re all the same and that race doesn’t matter doesn’t signify anti-racism; it reveals ignorance.
The Race Card
Ah, the infamous Race Card. This term is often thrown around whenever a person of color highlights an instance of racism. It’s a dismissive assertion that they’re exploiting their race for personal gain.
I’ve encountered this accusation frequently when addressing racist behavior. It’s essential to recognize that racism is ingrained in our culture to such an extent that many white individuals struggle to comprehend it. Thus, they often resort to blaming the victim. Just because you haven’t personally faced something doesn’t invalidate its existence.
Microaggressions
Microaggressions are subtle yet harmful comments or actions directed at individuals based on their group membership, often stemming from stereotypes. They occur frequently in everyday situations and should not be mistaken for a milder form of racism.
A common microaggression my children face is white women attempting to touch their hair out of “curiosity.” This stems from a sense of entitlement, fueled by white privilege. Other examples include mispronouncing an ethnic name or assuming a black person excels at basketball or an Asian individual is naturally good at math.
White Fragility
Discussing racial issues can be uncomfortable for many white individuals, as it forces them to confront their privilege and complicity in systemic racism. When faced with this discomfort, some react defensively. This might manifest as anger, denial, or withdrawal, shifting the focus away from the conversation about racial injustice to their own feelings.
For instance, when a black person expresses their distress over a police shooting, a white person might respond with “all lives matter,” diverting attention from the critical issue of racial profiling. This response serves to protect their comfort rather than acknowledge the difficult realities of discrimination.
Cultural Appropriation vs. Cultural Appreciation
Cultural appropriation occurs when someone takes elements from one culture for their own benefit without understanding their significance. For instance, a young white celebrity posting a picture of herself with cornrows for likes and attention exemplifies this. Conversely, cultural appreciation involves respectfully engaging with another culture without profiting from it. An example would be choosing to buy art from an Indigenous artist rather than appropriating styles for personal use.
Understanding these race-related terms can lead to more fruitful discussions about race within our homes, schools, workplaces, and communities. As Maya Angelou wisely stated, when we learn more, we can do better.
In summary, familiarizing yourself with these race terms can enhance conversations about racial dynamics and foster understanding. By addressing concepts such as white privilege, colorblindness, and cultural appropriation, we can pave the way for a more inclusive society.
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