We understand that if you’re not a child, the concept of using pronouns beyond “he” and “she” may be a challenge. For many, especially older generations, the idea can feel foreign—especially when it comes to pronouns like “ze,” “they,” or “xe.” Adjusting our language to accommodate these preferences can seem daunting, but it’s important to remember: it’s not as difficult as it may seem.
The discomfort often stems from a deeper issue—the recognition that individuals have the right to define their own gender identity. Many people experience gender as fluid, which means that their identity may not align with traditional male or female categories. If this notion feels overwhelming, perhaps it’s time to step back and reflect. After all, creating a supportive environment for our nonbinary, agender, and gender-nonconforming friends should be a priority.
Let’s clarify: no one is asking you to make extreme sacrifices. The request is simply to adjust your language in specific contexts. For example, if I’m discussing my friend Alex, who prefers the pronouns “they/them,” I should respect their choice and use those pronouns consistently. This practice isn’t about fear of repercussions; it’s about respect and kindness.
I have a sibling, Taylor, who is transgender. In their previous life, they were known as my sister, but that identity never felt true to them. Respecting Taylor’s current pronouns feels strange sometimes, especially when recounting childhood memories. Yet, it’s crucial to adapt and use “he” instead of “she.” It’s all about showing kindness and support.
Just like you wouldn’t speak negatively about someone behind their back, misgendering someone—using incorrect pronouns—should be avoided at all costs. Remember, whether it’s “he,” “she,” or “they,” misgendering is harmful.
Taking the leap to assert one’s pronouns is incredibly brave. Imagine having to announce every day, “Hello, I don’t identify as the gender assigned to me at birth; I identify as [insert gender identity]. Please use my preferred pronouns.” The courage it takes to make this statement can be staggering. Wouldn’t you want to be the person who stands beside them, offering support and understanding?
Using someone’s correct pronouns consistently helps normalize their identity and fosters an inclusive environment. It shows that you are an ally and willing to stand up for others.
Mistakes are inevitable. I often accidentally refer to Taylor as my sister while reminiscing about our childhood. Recently, I mistakenly said “sister” when telling my six-year-old about a story involving Taylor. “You have a SISTER?!” they exclaimed. Oops! It’s only Uncle Taylor now. My older child chimed in, “She means Uncle Taylor.” It’s awkward getting called out, especially by your own child, but it happens. Apologizing and doing better is part of the journey.
Ultimately, respecting someone’s pronouns costs nothing. It’s simply a shift in how we communicate. Being polite and considerate is what makes a civil society.
For more discussions on topics related to gender identity and inclusion, check out this insightful post. Additionally, if you’re interested in resources about artificial insemination, Make A Mom offers great insights. For further reading on fertility topics, you can visit Facts About Fertility.
Summary
Respecting individuals’ pronouns is essential and requires minimal effort. Acknowledging and using the correct pronouns fosters an inclusive environment and demonstrates kindness. Mistakes may happen, but learning and adapting is key to supporting those around us.
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