Seventeen summers ago, Mike pulled up to my house for the first time in his aging 1979 Dodge Diplomat. The leather seats were frayed, the paint had faded long ago, and the muffler was long gone. When he started the engine, it roared to life like a rocket launching from our quiet cul-de-sac.
I could have felt embarrassed by the stares we drew, but instead, as the wind whipped through my hair, I laughed, enjoying the wild chaos of the moment. Sitting next to him on that old bench seat, I felt like I was in a fairy tale, with that clunky car transformed into a magical carriage.
I’ll always remember how that rumbling engine made my heart race. I could hear him before I could see him, and the moment he appeared, I’d dash down the steps, filled with excitement to wrap my arms around him. That summer, as we fell in love, I felt fortunate to be his girl.
Fast forward to today, and I’m still deeply in love with my husband, but “lucky” isn’t the word I’d use anymore. Now, I feel proud. Our happiness is the result of hard work, not some random stroke of fortune. This triumph belongs to us alone—not destiny or luck.
Mike is a dedicated provider, always treating our kids and me with kindness and respect. In return, I strive to be a good partner, nurturing our family and cherishing him as my one and only. I recognize how fortunate I am to experience love, especially since I was 18. Yet, when people comment about how lucky we are to be so happy, it’s a tricky compliment to accept.
Our relationship didn’t flourish due to luck; it’s been shaped by effort. It would feel disingenuous to let others think our joy comes easy. Because it’s not; it gets messy. We’ve learned to tackle the challenges before they blow up into something unmanageable.
Our marriage is resilient because we’ve fought tooth and nail for it. Trust me, there have been moments when we’ve hurt each other deeply. We’ve faced times when our relationship hung by a thread, questioning whether we could mend the rifts. Once, we took a break, contemplating the end. But, we couldn’t walk away. That was over ten years ago, and while we still argue, it’s never been as precarious since.
We realized that the fear of losing one another motivated us to learn how to argue constructively. With time and maturity, we’ve mastered the art of stepping back when tensions rise, opting for open conversations instead of shutting each other out.
Even though I am fully committed to my marriage, I believe in divorce. It may seem contradictory, but I think some relationships naturally come to an end. There’s no point in pouring energy into a relationship that’s beyond repair. Life is too short to endure a miserable marriage. If it becomes too challenging, it might be time to reconsider. Only those within the marriage can determine its fate.
For us, our marriage is worth fighting for because we both choose to be here. We treat each other with respect, still feel that spark, and recognize that we’re happier together than apart. If that ever changes, so will our approach. Knowing when to fight and when to step back is crucial.
No marriage is simply lucky or blessed by chance. The couples you admire likely fought hard to achieve their happiness. So, the next time you see a couple that seems fortunate in love, remember that they may have battled fiercely to get there.
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In summary, while many perceive a strong marriage as a stroke of luck, the truth is that it is often the result of hard work, open communication, and a commitment to one another.
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