When I welcomed my daughter into the world, everything felt picture-perfect. My labor was quick and straightforward, with smooth contractions and a healthy baby to show for it. I couldn’t have hoped for a better delivery. The medical team was supportive, and my requests were honored. I even had a strong epidural that left me blissfully numb from the waist down.
The most delightful part was my daughter’s cheerful nature. She was calm, easygoing, and a natural at breastfeeding. She latched right away, and I thought nursing would be smooth sailing. However, within a few weeks, my experience shifted; the bond between us and my breastfeeding journey took a turn, and anxiety crept in.
I often wondered who was more distressed: me or the tiny, red-faced creature in my arms. It’s common to feel overwhelmed in those early days of parenting, but my emotional turmoil was deeper than just exhaustion. I was grappling with something called D-MER, or dysphoric milk ejection reflex.
For those unfamiliar, D-MER is a term that isn’t widely recognized but is crucial for many lactating mothers. According to a resourceful site, D-MER.org, managed by lactation consultant Alia Macrina Heise, dysphoric milk ejection reflex is characterized by sudden feelings of negative emotions right before milk release, lasting only a few minutes. In simpler terms, it’s an uncomfortable emotional response linked to the physical act of your milk letting down.
Each time my milk would let down, I’d experience a physical and emotional battle. My stomach would feel tight, a wave of sadness washed over me, and I could almost taste the bile rising. I felt disoriented and scared, battling invisible fears that loomed over me.
The good news? These feelings were fleeting. The anxiety often lasted only a couple of minutes, but in that time, it felt like forever. My legs trembled, my arms felt heavy, and I often fought against waves of nausea. I wanted to escape, yet I didn’t know where to go.
So how did I manage this? If you’re experiencing D-MER, here are some helpful strategies:
- Acknowledge Your Emotions: The first step to coping with D-MER is understanding it. Recognizing the connection between your physical sensations and emotional state can help you anticipate these feelings. Since my daughter fed every two hours, I learned to watch the clock. Knowing a letdown was imminent helped me prepare mentally.
- Distract Yourself: Engaging your hands or mind can be beneficial. Whether it’s snacking, fidgeting, or even standing up to move around, finding a distraction can channel your energy.
- Practice Relaxation Techniques: While meditation isn’t my strong suit, many find guided sessions on platforms like Calm, Headspace, or 10% Happier helpful in grounding themselves.
- Use the Alphabet Game: To divert your thoughts, categorize objects—like fruits or animals—and list them alphabetically in your mind. This simple exercise can be surprisingly effective in easing anxiety.
- Connect with Others: A quick text or call to a friend not only helps combat feelings of isolation but also reminds you that you’re not alone in this journey.
- Remember It’s Temporary: You’ve faced challenges before, and you can overcome this too. Take it one moment at a time.
If D-MER becomes overwhelming or you find these feelings persist, it’s vital to consult your OBGYN or a qualified professional, as they might be signs of other mood disorders.
If you’re interested in learning more about home insemination, check out our related post here. Additionally, for those navigating their fertility journey, Make a Mom provides invaluable insights. And for comprehensive information, the CDC offers excellent resources on pregnancy and home insemination.
In summary, navigating D-MER is challenging but manageable. By acknowledging your feelings, finding distractions, and seeking support, you can continue your breastfeeding journey with greater ease.
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