As we approach week six of our lockdown with a family of four, life feels incredibly different here in Italy compared to friends back in New York, who are just beginning their quarantine journey. The restrictions are tighter than ever, and for good reason. Jogging, biking, and even quick trips to the market for a few necessities have become a distant memory. The penalties for breaking rules can reach up to 5000 Euros. Our only escape is the brief moments we spend on our balconies—an experience for which we are exceedingly thankful. It’s clear we’re in this for the long haul.
Every week, my husband ventures out masked to gather essentials, and upon returning, he undresses at the door and jumps straight into the shower, tossing his clothes into the washing machine. Even our doorman now kicks packages to us from a safe distance. The kids have stopped asking to go outside, and while the music from neighboring balconies still plays, we no longer rush out at six o’clock with our tambourines. Some evenings, we skip the balcony festivities altogether. The rainbow artwork that once adorned our home is beginning to fade, both in color and spirit. Yet, we remain safe, healthy, and loved, and that’s the mantra I repeat to myself daily, even as the outside world becomes more chaotic.
While the silver linings may not shine as brightly as they once did, they still exist, along with some important realizations I’ve made as the situation evolves. My friends and family, both near and far, have been a vital source of support—my husband has truly been a rock. Most importantly, it’s my children—my own girls and the wonderful kids I teach—who keep me grounded, optimistic, and focused.
In this new reality, my husband and I have become the center of our daughters’ universe. From morning until night, we are their primary source of interaction, aside from YouTube. They absorb our words, tone, and expressions, so I strive to remain mindful of this daily. Of course, I don’t always succeed.
I am not a parenting expert, health professional, or crisis manager; I’m just navigating this like many of you are, perhaps with a bit more experience under my belt. This is a reflection of our journey, sharing some strategies and insights that have helped us, particularly for parents who suddenly find themselves working from home with young children. Your path may differ, and that’s perfectly fine; this is simply an attempt to offer practical and emotional support for those who might need it.
Do Your Best, but Accept Your Limits
This advice can be challenging for perfectionists. If you don’t cover every aspect of your children’s daily schoolwork, that’s completely acceptable. Balancing two parents working from home while managing a kindergarten curriculum and avoiding excessive screen time for our three-year-old is no small feat. Between meals, cleaning, movement breaks, and having fun, some days we hit the mark, while others are chaotic disasters. Emotions can fluctuate even in normal circumstances, so it’s only natural for them to intensify now.
Focus on Teaching Life Skills
Beyond the standard curriculum of reading, writing, and science, school also teaches invaluable life lessons such as social interaction and cooperation. Simple activities like a question game at dinner—where each person takes turns asking questions—can help reinforce these skills, as can board games that promote turn-taking. Assigning daily tasks, like setting the table, fosters a sense of teamwork within the household.
Make Mealtime Enjoyable
I’m not here to share a gourmet recipe, as cooking has never been my forte. Instead, I emphasize meal sustainability. Preparing three meals daily can be overwhelming, so we focus on making meals that yield leftovers. Grocery shopping has transformed from a fun outing to a stressful chore, so we plan meals that allow for fewer trips and maximum use of ingredients. We’ve gotten creative with leftovers, turning taco meat into a pot pie or using leftover rice in a frittata. Our goal is to create fun traditions, like taco night, which gives us something to look forward to amidst the chaos.
Be Mindful with Decluttering
With extra time at home, you might feel the urge to declutter. My advice: focus on your own belongings, and tread carefully with your kids’. Their belongings hold significant value, especially now. Instead of purging, allow them to reconnect with forgotten toys and find joy in their existing treasures.
Incorporate Scream Time
Yes, you read that right! A friend suggested the idea of scream time as a release. When tensions peak in the late afternoon, gather everyone for a two-minute scream-off—perhaps with music to muffle the sound. In our apartment, we’ve even transitioned to singing our screams to favorite tunes.
Ask About Weekend Plans
Our usual weekend question has shifted dramatically. I initially felt overwhelmed with free time, but it’s essential to save some fun projects for the weekend. This way, both kids and parents have something to look forward to, making those days feel special.
Appreciate Simple Pleasures
Remember the joy of mundane tasks? For me, it’s a long, hot shower (door locked, with ’90s R&B playing). I take my time, indulging in self-care rituals that I would typically rush through. These moments are vital for mental well-being.
Add a Dash of Whimsy
Think back to Peewee’s Playhouse and the “word of the day” concept. We’ve adopted a similar tradition, selecting a secret word each day that prompts a fun reaction whenever it’s said. This adds an element of excitement to our daily routines.
Encourage Artistic Expression
While DIY crafts can sometimes feel overwhelming, I believe in the therapeutic power of art—especially in challenging times. Provide your kids with basic materials and let them create freely. I’ve seen an increase in student participation in my art classes since we transitioned to online learning; it’s a much-needed outlet for them.
Shield Children from Overexposure to News
While I value teachable moments about tough topics, this is a frightening time, and children don’t need to be burdened with every detail. They understand that many are sick, and we’re staying home for their safety. It’s essential to provide reassurance without overwhelming them with distressing information.
In conclusion, these weeks have been a journey of adaptation, resilience, and finding joy in the small things. As we continue to navigate this extraordinary time, we’re learning and growing together as a family.
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