Having a baby prematurely is a challenging experience, and unwelcome comments from friends or strangers can add to that stress. Moms who have been through it share the most hurtful things they’ve encountered.
Comments About Appearances
One mom recalled a friend describing her baby as looking “not even human.” Ouch! Another shared the shock of hearing, “Wow, he looks like a regular baby now.” What did they think she gave birth to, a space alien? One mom mentioned how people complimented her appearance post-delivery, completely ignoring that her baby was born at 34 weeks. Another said, “At least you didn’t have to worry about stretch marks!” Seriously, that’s not helpful. It’s disheartening when visitors can’t muster a simple, “Oh, he’s so cute!” while their baby is in the NICU.
Comments About Being Overprotective
Many moms feel judged for being overly cautious, especially when it comes to hygiene. “Oh, don’t be so protective! He needs to build his immune system!”—clearly, they didn’t understand how vulnerable preemies really are.
Comments About the Bright Side
Some friends tried to be supportive by saying things like, “At least they’re in the best place,” but that felt more like a slap in the face. Others suggested that since the baby was in the NICU, the mom should take the opportunity to rest at home. Sure, if only worrying and pumping breast milk allowed for a good night’s sleep! It’s tough when people imply that having a dedicated nurse is like having a babysitter while you’re stuck at the hospital.
If you’re navigating the world of parenting, especially with a preemie, check out more insights in our other blog post here. And if you’re looking into fertility options, consider the best at-home insemination kit provider, Make a Mom. For a thorough understanding of pregnancy week by week, visit March of Dimes.
In summary, it’s essential to approach moms of preemies with empathy and understanding. Unhelpful comments can add to their stress, so it’s best to offer genuine support and kindness instead.
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