As summer approaches, I find myself reflecting on the past thirteen years of being a Black mother, particularly the anxieties that accompany this season. With the ongoing pandemic and the tragic murder of George Floyd by police officers in Minneapolis, my fears for my children—and yours—have intensified. The current climate of unrest and violence has made the stakes feel even higher.
Like many mothers, I yearn for my son to enjoy a summer filled with laughter, friendships, and personal growth. I want him to thrive and chase his dreams. Yet, I can’t help but question whether my white mom friends share similar concerns: Do they worry that their teenage sons might not make it to high school? The harrowing video captured by a courageous teenager named Lily, documenting the horrific event, serves as a stark reminder of the fragility of our children’s lives.
Learning from Tragedy
So, what can we learn from the tragedy of George Floyd? Just as the pandemic has brought many of us together in shared struggle, the fight against racism requires our collective action. We must not turn away from the ongoing violence against Black individuals; it’s our responsibility to confront this head-on.
Extending Solidarity
As mothers, we often bond over the challenges we face in raising our children. Let’s extend that solidarity to support Black mothers, too. Attend rallies, workshops, and educational events to understand the struggles and fears that Black families endure. And bring your kids along; it’s vital they witness this journey.
Imagine if the dreams you have for your child were suddenly taken away by a police officer’s unjust actions. How would that feel? Would your child’s skin color evoke fear in the eyes of law enforcement? These are questions that deserve our contemplation.
Reflecting on Discomfort
Take a moment to reflect on these feelings. Are you uncomfortable? Good. That discomfort signals the need for change. I have mourned for mothers I’ve never met—Lily’s mother, for instance, or Tamara’s, or Michael’s. We cannot afford to wait for another tragedy before asking, “What can I do?”
Becoming Effective Allies
As a Black woman, I feel compelled to guide my white counterparts in becoming more aware and effective allies. Statistically, Black women face a 1.4 times greater risk of being killed by police compared to white women. Black men are 2.5 times more likely than their white counterparts to be victims of police violence. This isn’t just a statistic; it’s a reality that calls for immediate action.
Eight years ago, I attended a workshop aimed at Undoing Racism. It was an eye-opening experience that fostered authentic conversations about race. Let’s start by examining who you are at your core. Growing up in a diverse environment or having Black friends does not exempt you from complicity in systemic racism. Educating ourselves about these biases is the first step toward being effective allies.
Speaking Up and Advocating for Change
Challenge yourself to speak up against police brutality and racism in any setting—be it among friends, family, or colleagues. Your children are observing your actions, and they will learn from your example. Encourage them to stand up for their Black peers when they witness injustice.
Use your privilege to advocate for change. This fight belongs to all of us; it is not confined to one race or community. Together, we can advance our society towards justice and equity.
Uniting for Justice
Let’s unite, listen, and grow. We owe it to the memories of those like Philando Castile, Sandra Bland, and Tamir Rice to keep their stories alive and to strive for a more just world.
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In summary, it is crucial for white mothers to engage in the fight against racism, educate themselves, and use their voices to advocate for the lives of marginalized communities. Let’s commit to being better allies for the sake of our children and future generations.
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