I can’t be the only one whose house ends up looking like a whirlwind of toys, baby dolls, clothing, stray socks, schoolwork, and snack wrappers by the time the week wraps up. Each Monday starts with a somewhat tidy home and optimistic energy, but the chaos of the week sweeps in like a storm, leaving behind a path of kid-related clutter. We manage to stay on top of the dishes and take out the trash, accepting the rest as just part of life.
Every weekend, my partner straps our little one to his back in one of our many baby carriers, assigns age-appropriate tasks to our older kids, and everyone in the family pitches in to restore order to our home. I’m usually right there with them, though sometimes I seize that time to catch up on writing I couldn’t finish during the week. My kids see me doing all the “household” chores, trying to keep things from getting too messy, but the big weekend cleanup? That’s Dad’s domain.
This past weekend, my eldest son brought me his child-sized baby doll carrier and asked if he could wear his baby doll while tidying his room, “just like Daddy does with Amelia.” For hours, my husband wore our daughter while my son carried “Henry Jr.” around the house, cleaning, playing, and having lunch.
Depending on who you ask, this might not conform to the traditional image of how a seven-year-old boy should play. Most companies market baby dolls primarily to girls, but I’m thankful that in my world, rigid gender roles regarding clothing and play seem to be fading. Many people have made meaningful progress in this area, and it matters.
Unfortunately, some people still cling to outdated notions. By the time many boys reach my son’s age, they’ve been told to “man up” or to “stop acting like a girl” whenever they express emotions or show interest in activities labeled as “feminine.” In some circles, my son’s nurturing play with his dolls might still be perceived as unusual.
Fortunately, my son isn’t bothered by such ideas. He has never been taught that femininity is inferior to masculinity. He doesn’t equate being gentle with weakness.
Henry is naturally kind. He will joyfully spend an hour in the playpen entertaining his baby sister and comforts his younger brother when he faces disappointment. He enjoys playing veterinarian and hosting pet adoption events.
He also wears his baby doll in a carrier while pretending to be a father cleaning the house as his wife works. Of course, he also loves roughhousing, getting dirty, and giggling at silly sounds; he could talk endlessly about dinosaurs. He doesn’t categorize activities by gender; he simply enjoys what he enjoys.
When asked about his future, he says he wants to either be a paleontologist or a marine scientist — and always a dad. He frequently discusses his desire to have a family, just as I did at his age. What I find particularly heartwarming is his aspiration to be a stay-at-home dad.
If that dream continues to resonate with him, I hope he has the opportunity to pursue it. Being a stay-at-home parent was my dream, and I’m currently living it. I want that for him too. At some point, it may make sense emotionally or financially for either of my sons to take on the role of stay-at-home parent while their partner works. Rather than viewing this as a weakness or failure, I want them to see it as a valid and honorable way to spend their time. Fatherhood, even as a primary role, does not diminish a man’s identity. Stay-at-home fatherhood is just as significant and valuable as motherhood.
I hope we’ve built a solid foundation for this understanding.
It’s widely considered adorable when a little girl learns to change her own oil in the garage alongside her dad. Remember the cute little girl in Remember the Titans who passionately cheered for the football players? She was loved by all. I think it’s equally charming when boys embrace roles traditionally associated with women, especially when they are inspired by a great father figure.
My husband isn’t perfect—he drives me up the wall and I do the same to him. We’re a good team, but we have our flaws. However, he truly shines as a father. He has worn our babies more often than I ever have; he’s involved in every aspect of parenting and does it wholeheartedly.
It might be a bit unusual for a boy to carry his baby doll in a carrier while cleaning his room. It’s not typical for a child to prioritize fatherhood above all else. Yet, it’s perfectly normal for a son to emulate his dad, especially when that father is kind, loving, and fun.
For my boys, caring for the home and nurturing babies is part of being a man. Since their birth, a man has lovingly taken care of them. I hope they continue to embrace this open-mindedness as they grow, and I pray they will never feel ashamed of their gentler sides.
The world already has plenty of overly rugged masculinity; what it truly needs is more kind, gentle souls. If that’s the kind of man my son becomes, I’ll happily support him in nurturing that love and kindness.
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Potential Search Queries:
- Why is it important for boys to play with dolls?
- How to encourage nurturing behavior in boys?
- Gender roles in parenting: A modern perspective
- The benefits of being a stay-at-home dad
- How to support your child’s interests in non-traditional gender roles
Summary:
In this reflective piece, Emily shares her pride in her son’s love for nurturing play with his baby doll, emphasizing the importance of breaking traditional gender roles. She highlights how her husband’s active involvement in parenting sets a positive example for their children. Emily hopes to foster a sense of understanding that caregiving is a valuable role for anyone, regardless of gender. The article encourages embracing gentleness and kindness in boys and recognizes the need for diverse expressions of masculinity.
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