Dear Neighbor,
As I strolled through our neighborhood with my daughters, I noticed the sign in your yard that reads, “Every day in Pennsylvania, a baby is killed in late-term abortion.” After pondering the message for a while, I felt compelled to share my story with you.
At 32 weeks and 5 days into my pregnancy, I received the heartbreaking news that my son had passed away. I underwent induction and delivered a beautiful baby boy, but he was silent. The only tears in that delivery room were our own, mourning the loss of our cherished child. After years of struggling with infertility, his absence is a profound sorrow that I will carry for life.
Since then, I’ve connected with other mothers who have experienced similar losses, and I want to share a few of their stories with you.
Stories of Other Mothers
One mother discovered that her unborn child had multiple anomalies rendering the baby “incompatible with life.” Faced with the unavoidable reality of her baby’s death, she chose to deliver early. This allowed her the precious opportunity to hold her child while he was alive, even if just for a few moments. By choosing early delivery, she essentially removed her baby from life support. This choice is labeled as a “late-term abortion.”
Another mother went for her 21-week anatomy scan and learned that her baby had anencephaly, a condition where parts of the brain are missing. This child would never survive outside her womb; the mother was the only thing keeping her baby alive. She opted for a dilation and curettage (D&C) to avoid the physical pain of labor, already grappling with the emotional torment of knowing her child would not live. This, too, is classified as a “late-term abortion.”
The Misunderstanding of Late-Term Abortions
It’s important to note that the term “late-term abortion” lacks a medical definition and is not recognized by the medical professionals who treat these women. The stories I shared above would typically be categorized as “termination for medical reasons.” However, if we want to use strict definitions, they are indeed abortions. Abortions occurring after 21 weeks account for just 1% of all abortions. These women, along with many others, contribute to that statistic.
These women are not those who decide in their 30th week of pregnancy that they no longer want a child. They are individuals confronted with devastating circumstances, compelled to make agonizing decisions. They choose to spend a brief amount of time with their child alive, trying to create lasting memories in mere seconds or minutes. They are subjected to shame and political discourse due to signs like yours that promote misleading narratives.
I understand the anguish of losing a child and the experience of holding my deceased son in my arms. I had no choice in that matter. However, if I had known that his death was inevitable and had the option to spend any amount of time with him alive—time to see him open his eyes or make any sound of life—I would have chosen that. I would have chosen what you refer to as a “late-term abortion.”
Please consider the pain these women endure and refrain from politicizing their experiences. I urge you to show empathy and think of mothers like myself when perpetuating the harmful narrative surrounding “late-term abortion.” These women are not monsters; they are mothers making the best choices they can for their children.
Sincerely,
Your Neighbor and Fellow Bereaved Mother
If you want to learn more about similar topics, check out this blog post for additional insights. Also, for resources on pregnancy and home insemination, visit WomensHealth.gov.
Search Queries:
- What is a late-term abortion?
- Stories of mothers who experienced late-term loss
- Understanding medical reasons for late-term abortions
- Emotional impact of late-term abortion decisions
- Resources for bereaved parents
Summary:
This letter addresses the misconception surrounding late-term abortions, sharing personal stories of mothers who have faced devastating circumstances that led them to make difficult decisions. It aims to foster empathy and understanding by highlighting the emotional pain of losing a child and the importance of refraining from politicizing such deeply personal experiences.
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