I keep encountering this meme that says, “I’ll still be your friend if you voted for Trump, I’ll still be your friend if you voted for Biden…” and it honestly frustrates me. The truth is, these two candidates represent vastly different ideologies. While Joe Biden isn’t perfect, he stands in stark contrast to Donald Trump, who embodies racism, misogyny, and xenophobia. If you still support him after everything that’s transpired over the last four years, then frankly, I don’t want to maintain our friendship. Supporting such a figure raises serious doubts about your regard for my well-being.
Some may feel indifferent about their friends’ voting choices, but I am not one of those people. I’m aware that some of my friends supported Trump in 2016, and likely did so again this year. One of them is a long-time friend, and I was genuinely horrified to learn of their choice. Trump’s agenda has been clear from the beginning, and if someone I know can endorse that, it makes me rethink our friendship entirely.
The Impact of Political Choices on Personal Relationships
The friend I knew for certain who voted for him? We didn’t speak for three years because I couldn’t reconcile the friend I knew with someone who could make that choice. For me, this is a dealbreaker. As a Black, queer, and lower-income woman, I know this administration actively seeks to marginalize me. I cannot associate with someone who supports that.
Growing up on Staten Island, my social circle has mostly been white. I know that some view me as one of their few Black friends, often labeling me as the “good” Black person. While I may seem to fit certain stereotypes — I’m well-educated and have a supportive family — I still face the same societal issues that affect all Black Americans. A police officer won’t care about my accomplishments or education; they’ll judge me solely on the color of my skin.
Complicity and Silence
To my knowledge, none of my friends are openly racist. However, I can’t be sure of how they behave when I’m not around. Just because they don’t make racist jokes in my presence doesn’t mean they don’t tolerate such behavior elsewhere. Many of my friends are from Staten Island, a place that has shown strong support for Trump in both the 2016 and 2020 elections. They might not realize that their silence on racist remarks is a form of complicity.
Some people need a personal connection to understand why voting against Trump is essential. While I’m not comfortable being someone’s token Black friend, I hope they think of me when considering their reasons. We should desire a safer, better country for everyone we care about. Whether they acknowledge it or not, Trump is a white supremacist who has repeatedly failed to denounce such ideologies. His comments during the debates, telling the Proud Boys to “stand down, and stand by,” signal a call for division and conflict. As a Black person, how can I maintain friendships with those who support him?
The Broader Implications of Supporting Trump
Supporting Trump for any reason—be it tax policies or social issues—means endorsing his entire agenda. His policies affect all of us, and if friends support him for financial gain, they’re choosing to overlook the racism that comes with it. I’m not a practicing Muslim, but with an Arabic name, I worry about my safety if his administration were to target Muslims. If you endorse his anti-abortion stance, you’re also endorsing his xenophobia.
Let’s also remember that he has significantly influenced the Supreme Court, jeopardizing not just Roe v. Wade but also marriage equality. As someone who has known I was queer since my youth, I’ve finally found the love of my life and we’re planning to marry. However, the fear of potential legal obstacles looms over us. One friend admitted she voted for Biden, but her husband chose Trump. When we get married, he won’t be on the guest list. You can’t celebrate my happiness while supporting someone who seeks to undermine my rights.
The Anxiety of Uncertainty
None of my friends are aware of the anxiety I’ve felt throughout this election. Seeing them post about voting without any indication of their choices has left me questioning if they voted for Trump. I want to trust them, but without clear communication, I’m left to assume the worst. It’s hard to believe that people who claim to love you would vote to strip away your rights. The sad reality is that many white voters often prioritize their interests over those of marginalized communities.
Conclusion: The Stakes Are Too High
Four years ago, I might have extended grace to friends who voted for Trump. Now? Absolutely not. If you’re aware of the fears faced by marginalized people and still choose to support that man, then you’re no friend of mine. Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice? It’s time to part ways.
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Search Queries:
- Why does voting matter in friendships?
- The impact of Trump’s policies on marginalized communities.
- How to navigate friendships with differing political views.
- The significance of voting in the LGBTQ+ community.
- Understanding systemic racism in politics.
In summary, the choice to support Trump impacts relationships profoundly, especially for those who belong to marginalized groups. As a Black queer woman, I cannot reconcile friendships with those who endorse an agenda that threatens my rights and safety. The stakes are too high, and it’s essential to prioritize integrity over comfort in relationships.
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