Updated: Jan. 25, 2021
As the first among my friends to become a parent, I now find myself navigating the teenage years while many of my peers are just starting this journey. There are days it feels like an endless cycle of challenges, but I remind myself that this phase is temporary. Looking back, I chuckle at some of the antics, like the time I caught my teen trying to mask the smell of smoke with a paper towel tube filled with fabric softener sheets. Classic.
Recently, my friends have started reaching out for advice, and their messages range from “My kids are driving me crazy!” to “How do you survive this phase?” I can relate to their struggles and have certainly had my share of overwhelming moments. To help my sanity (and theirs), I’ve decided to let go of a few things:
1. The Battle Over Clean Rooms
I used to get so worked up about my teens’ messy rooms. They can be downright disgusting—think random collections of Q-tips and clothes strewn everywhere. It took me a while to realize that if they want to live in chaos, so be it. I simply keep their doors closed and refuse to clean up after them. Eventually, they will tackle the mess themselves, allowing me to daydream about transforming those spaces once they leave.
2. Long Shower Times
Whether they’re into grooming or not, teens love to take their time in the shower. While I’ve tried timers and reminders, I’ve come to accept that shower time is their sanctuary. It’s a space where they can unwind and think without interruptions. As long as they aren’t monopolizing the bathroom, I’ve decided to give them this small gift of privacy.
3. Monitoring Their Diet
My son, now 17 and towering at 6’1″, has an insatiable appetite. If he wants to munch on leftover pizza at breakfast or snack all day, I’ve learned to let it go. Teens often have complicated relationships with food, and I’m not here to micromanage their choices. They’re old enough to understand their bodies, and I’ve done my part in introducing them to healthy options over the years. As I watch my youngest concoct a bowl of chips topped with Pop Tarts for breakfast, I remind myself that my role as a food enforcer is done.
In the grand scheme of parenting teenagers, these issues may seem trivial. They can be messy, eat a lot, and sometimes wear the same clothes multiple days in a row. However, focusing on raising kind and responsible young adults is far more important. Trust me, there are bigger battles ahead, and you’ll thank yourself for not sweating the small stuff.
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Summary:
Navigating the teenage years can be challenging for parents. By letting go of the need to control their messy rooms, shower durations, and eating habits, parents can foster a more peaceful home environment. Focusing on raising responsible young adults is far more valuable than sweating the small stuff.
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