Last Wednesday was a remarkable day. My children, who are learning remotely, my partner, and I gathered around the TV to watch the inauguration, completely engrossed. Each moment felt more enchanting than the last. I found myself tearing up and cheering loudly. My youngest and I donned our faux pearls in support of Kamala Harris, while my son enthusiastically gave President Biden a thumbs-up from the furniture.
After four agonizing years filled with uncertainty, we finally reached a day we had long awaited. The presidential race was nerve-wracking, but when Biden and Harris emerged victorious, we felt a wave of relief and hope. Inauguration day brought an energy that captivated us, but now that the event has passed and the work of the Biden-Harris administration has begun, we find ourselves utterly exhausted.
As a multiracial family, reflecting on the past four years under Trump is painful. His treatment of people of color was appalling—from tossing paper towels to hurricane victims to branding Mexicans as “rapists,” obsessing over a wall, separating families, and labeling African nations and Haiti as “shithole countries.” His hostility towards movements like Black Lives Matter and his demand for “law and order” only exacerbated the divide.
His actions stirred up an alarming boldness among racists. He ignored the devastating impact of COVID-19 on communities of color and attempted to frighten “suburban housewives” into voting for him under false pretenses. The culmination of his presidency was witnessing a mob, some waving Confederate flags, storm the Capitol.
He was relentless, unstable, and the antithesis of the Obamas. Watching him leave was a moment of triumph.
The night before the inauguration, I struggled to sleep. My Generalized Anxiety Disorder makes me apprehensive about everything; I worried that the inauguration was too good to be true. But it happened—and beautifully. When Jennifer Lopez stepped into the sunlight to sing, it was hard not to feel her emotions, knowing how precarious this moment was.
In the days following the inauguration, I’ve grappled with grief over the 400,000 lives lost to the coronavirus and the deep divisions within our country, which should never have existed in response to the murders of Ahmaud Arbery, Breonna Taylor, and George Floyd. Trump’s presidency fanned the flames of hatred, empowering those who harbored resentment.
It’s disheartening that more votes weren’t cast for a capable and compassionate leadership team. However, I’m trying to focus on the present, recognizing that we now have leaders prepared to address the chaos left in Trump’s wake. It’s a daunting task, but I believe they can rise to the occasion.
These past four years have felt like an endless roller coaster. Despite attempts to disconnect for our mental health, the political turmoil seeped into our lives, affecting BIPOCs the most—including my children, who faced systemic racism.
I’m not naïve enough to think a single politician or event can heal our nation’s wounds. Despite the magic of the inauguration—from Amanda Gorman’s poignant poem to Madam Vice President Harris making history and President Biden’s message of hope—we’re still grappling with a deep divide, largely due to the previous administration. Yet, we stand at the beginning of a new chapter, ready for change.
I’m hesitant to embrace hope right now. I want to believe that new leadership can bring about racial equity and end the pandemic, yet I know many people still support a president who displayed blatant misogyny and racism.
The trauma of the last four years has left many of us feeling numb and confused. We’ve lost loved ones and discovered that some we trusted turned out to be supporters of hate. If I, as a white, middle-class woman, am feeling post-inauguration fatigue, I can only imagine how much heavier the burden has been for BIPOCs.
As we begin to exhale after holding our breath for so long, it’s clear that significant work lies ahead. Those who voted for hate remain among us—in workplaces, schools, and even within our families. While new leadership can set the tone for change, it’s up to each individual to foster growth within themselves.
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In summary, while the inauguration marked a hopeful turn for many, the emotional toll of the past four years remains heavy. We are at the start of a new journey, but the collective effort to heal and unite is just beginning.
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