Sex has never been a point of stress in my relationship. Unlike many couples who grapple with differing libidos—especially in heterosexual partnerships—my partner and I have enjoyed a nearly two-decade-long pattern of intimacy nearly every day. However, this dynamic shifts dramatically when I’m breastfeeding.
Having welcomed three little ones into our lives, I’ve discovered that breastfeeding utterly extinguishes my sex drive. It’s as if my libido has packed its bags and left home. The act of producing milk seems to zap my desire, and this effect lingers throughout my nursing journey.
Not only does breastfeeding diminish my inclination to get intimate, but it also makes achieving orgasms a Herculean task. Even when my partner brings his A-game, it can take nearly an hour and a miracle to reach that elusive peak. Thankfully, my husband is incredibly understanding and never complains. We’re in this together; it’s not just my body that’s affected, but our shared experience.
When I’m nursing, I often feel overwhelmed by constant physical touch, leaving little desire for more. Babies are relentless—hungry? They want a breast. Tired? They want a breast. Scared? Guess what? They want a breast. It’s a never-ending cycle!
Yet, there’s hope on the horizon. Each time my children reach their first birthday, my body begins to return to its pre-baby self. While many factors contribute to this change, the reduction in nursing sessions plays a significant role. My youngest recently turned one, and with her nursing down to just a couple of times a day, I’m finally feeling rejuvenated—and ready for action!
Just a few weeks ago, I awoke to find my husband, freshly showered, standing in our room. Suddenly, I was wide awake and frustrated by the ticking clock. All morning, I couldn’t shake thoughts of him. I texted him something spicy during his lunch break, and by the time he got home, I had orchestrated the perfect scenario to ensure our kids were occupied or napping.
I had never seen him undress so quickly. For the first time in over a year, my body responded to him like it used to. It wasn’t a lengthy process; it felt natural, and once it was over, he smiled and said, “Welcome back.”
This moment was a huge relief, especially considering my age—I’m in my late thirties—and I had begun to worry that my body was broken after three rapid pregnancies. Thankfully, I was wrong. Since that day, I’ve been “working” quite a bit while my husband showers, and even managed to sneak in some morning action, much to my surprise.
The return to intimacy has reignited my sense of self. I feel more relaxed, and my anxiety has lessened. The endorphins from those intimate moments have made everything seem more manageable.
What I’ve learned is that there’s nothing wrong with preferring a cozy night in over passionate encounters during the postpartum phase. It’s completely normal to need time to readjust, and everyone has their own timeline. If you’re struggling to feel sexy since becoming a parent, take heart: you will find your way back.
Yes, the sounds of children’s music might accompany your rendezvous, but you’ll learn to tune that out and enjoy those intimate moments again.
For more insights about the journey of parenthood and intimacy, check out our related blog post on home insemination and explore resources from Make A Mom for anyone navigating similar experiences. Additionally, Drugs.com offers excellent guidance for pregnancy and home insemination.
Search Queries:
- breastfeeding and libido
- postpartum intimacy
- nursing and sex drive
- how to boost libido after pregnancy
- sex life after childbirth
Summary:
Breastfeeding can significantly impact a woman’s sex drive, often leaving her feeling disconnected from her partner. However, as nursing decreases, many women find their libido returns, allowing for a reconnection with their partner. It’s important to remember that each person’s timeline for resuming intimacy is different, and what’s normal for one may not be for another. Embracing the journey of motherhood and sexuality can lead to renewed intimacy and self-acceptance.
Leave a Reply