A few weeks ago, my son celebrated his eighth birthday, and despite the ongoing pandemic, we did our best to make it memorable. With him attending virtual school, we couldn’t bring treats to his class or throw a big party at a trampoline park or Chuck E. Cheese. Instead, we gave him some online gift cards for a Fortnite skin, ordered his favorite takeout, sang “Happy Birthday” over cake, and arranged a small, socially-distanced playdate with a couple of friends at the park.
At eight, birthdays mean the world to kids. Over the past year, parents have had to get creative to ensure their children feel cherished while remaining safe. Our family was no exception.
But for me, turning 41 meant birthdays are just… okay. I’m not overly worried about aging, so my birthday isn’t particularly significant. I don’t dwell on it like I do for my kids’ celebrations.
For many, however, birthdays can evoke negative feelings, reminding them of past hurts, absent loved ones, or even dreaded family gatherings. And with COVID-19 impacting everyone’s special day over the past year, it’s been tough for those who simply wanted a moment of solitude but found themselves quarantined with a busy family.
When my daughter asked what I wanted for my birthday, I jokingly replied, “Just 15 minutes of silence!” She cheerfully responded, “I went a whole 8 hours! Happy birthday!” What can one do?
Confessions from Others
Some confessions from others echo this sentiment:
- One mom just wants a hotel room to escape the chaos.
- Another wished for just one day free from political discussions, but her husband managed only two hours of peace.
- A common wish among many mothers is simply to have some quiet time, free from obligations.
This year has been tough: we faced unexpected delays in getting a new puppy, and family members keep trying to impose their plans on our celebrations. Many have shared feelings about family pressures, whether it’s the in-laws’ expectations or the disappointment of gifts that miss the mark.
We all want our birthdays to feel special, yet often, they highlight how unappreciated we may feel. It’s easy to forget that birthdays—especially ours—often serve as reminders of the love and recognition we crave.
Let this be a gentle nudge to reach out and show affection to those in your life on their special days. A simple “Happy Birthday” can go a long way to make someone feel valued. You don’t need to break the bank to show you care, but genuine acknowledgement is key.
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In summary, birthdays can evoke a range of emotions, especially as we transition from the joy of being a child to the complexities of adulthood. While children often celebrate with excitement, many adults find themselves feeling overlooked and unappreciated. It’s important to cherish and honor those special days, not just for ourselves but for others as well.
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