To the individuals who have never experienced the confines of a locked crisis unit, or faced the unsettling reality of being physically harmed by their own child—the very one they have nurtured with every fiber of their being. To those who offer unsolicited advice, claiming that if it were their child, they would call authorities or seek institutionalization. To those who believe that the symptoms of mental illness stem solely from poor parenting, and that stricter discipline is the solution.
To those unaware of what it’s like to spend days in an emergency room, waiting for a psychiatric bed that may never come, only to find that the next treatment program fails to meet their child’s needs. To those who remain blissfully ignorant of the mental health crisis affecting our society, and who are unaware of the years-long waitlists caused by a severe shortage of qualified professionals in the field. Many avoid this line of work due to its challenges and low pay, leaving families with few options.
To the devoted parents and caregivers: This message is for you. The ones who have tried countless strategies, yet see no improvement, but continue to fight for their child’s wellbeing. This is for those who dread another visit to the ER, who feel trapped in a cycle of despair and uncertainty.
This is for the parents who must protect their other children, both physically and emotionally, from the turmoil that can come from living with a sibling facing mental health challenges. You are the masters of negotiation and multitasking, perpetually on high alert.
This letter speaks to the parent who has had close calls while driving, distracted by worry over their child’s struggles. The parent who feels overwhelmed and exhausted, yet has no choice but to keep going. The one who misses work too often, their mind consumed with concern, all while attempting to juggle the demands of their family life.
This is for every parent whose heart aches from the fear of their own child, feeling helpless as they watch their loved one suffer.
You are not alone. Even when it feels isolating, you are seen. There’s a community of caregivers who understand your journey. Mental health issues do not discriminate; they affect families from all walks of life, regardless of their circumstances. They can be present in the homes of professionals, community leaders, and families who seem to have it all together.
To those who judge from the sidelines, please hold your comments. If you haven’t walked this difficult path, it’s best to keep your opinions to yourself.
For those in the thick of it, know that you are seen. While I can’t promise that everything will be okay, I can assure you that you are not alone.
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In summary, this letter serves as a reminder that parents and caregivers dealing with a child’s mental health challenges are not alone in their struggles. It emphasizes the importance of community support and understanding, while also addressing the misconceptions held by those outside this experience.
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