When I was younger, Justine Bateman represented the epitome of cool on television. Her portrayal of Mallory Keaton on Family Ties was not only entertaining, but she also radiated a sense of nonchalance toward fame, beauty, and trends. While she was undeniably stylish in the ‘80s, her current persona is even more impressive.
Bateman embodies a genuine disregard for societal expectations regarding appearance; she truly embraces who she is without apology.
Recently, her interviews promoting her book Face: One Square Foot of Skin inspired me to cheer. I found myself wanting to celebrate her, while also feeling a wave of relief. Justine Bateman stands as a powerful figure representing what it truly means to be confident and unapologetic.
Her book features a series of short narratives that delve into the complex relationship women have with aging. One of her key messages is to stop labeling her as brave just for showing her unfiltered self.
Isn’t it bizarre that telling a woman she’s “brave” for simply looking herself carries such a negative connotation? It’s as if we’re communicating, “I couldn’t possibly look like you, but good on you!” Seriously, what’s up with that?
This isn’t about debating the merits of cosmetic enhancements; Bateman and I agree that such discussions miss the real issue. We need to examine why we feel pressured to conform to a specific image, rather than the choices we make in response to that pressure.
As Bateman explained to Glamour magazine, it’s vital to confront the fears that drive us. “When I can pinpoint the root fear that has taken hold of me, I can make progress,” she shared.
For me, that fear often stems from a sense of inadequacy, fear of judgment, and feeling invisible. Wrinkles serve as stark reminders of aging, which society unfortunately views as a drawback, particularly for women over 40. In a culture that often encourages women to hide their age, many of us pretend we’re younger than we are.
I once believed I would gracefully embrace aging. Yet here I am, frequently tugging at my face and grimacing at the reflection I see during Zoom meetings. Oh, look—there’s the older, grumpier version of me! And I spend the entire meeting fixated on how to appear less… aged.
Even virtual platforms now offer facial editing tools!
I recall a time when I was content with my appearance. I used to enjoy posing for pictures instead of ducking behind a hoodie. Despite my overall satisfaction with myself, today’s social media landscape and the obsession with youth are threatening to undermine that confidence.
The effort I put into trying to look younger is draining and disheartening. The patriarchy has long understood that the more exhausted women feel, the less empowered we are. Consequently, substantial sums are spent making us feel inadequate about our looks. Enough already!
Lately, I’ve come to a realization: I am 43 years old, and I look it—embracing that fact feels liberating!
I refuse to feel shame about growing older. Even my doctor has advertisements for cosmetic procedures in the office. When we can’t even attend a routine check-up without being bombarded with messages to alter our appearances, it sends the clear signal that looking our age is unacceptable.
To clarify, I still plan to treat myself to some beauty maintenance post-vaccination, like eyebrow waxing and hair coloring. But there’s a stark difference between minor upkeep and the normalization of invasive procedures just to look decades younger. Bateman encourages us to reject the misogyny—both external and internal—that insists we must conform to specific beauty standards to be valued.
This isn’t limited to Hollywood or filtered pictures on social media. I remember asking for skincare advice in an online group and was criticized for not doing more to care for my skin. Really? Thanks for the reminder that aging is somehow shameful!
It’s all so twisted.
As Bateman noted in Vanity Fair, “Everyone talks about empowering women, but empowering them for what? To inject plastic into their faces? How about feeling empowered to step out confidently and say, ‘Forget you, I look fabulous’?”
She also highlights the adverse effects of this trend on teenagers in our heavily curated Instagram world. “Teens now compare themselves not just to peers but to everyone online. It’s overwhelming,” Bateman, a mother of two teens, pointed out. “Even women who filter their photos often don’t have wrinkles to begin with. That’s just wild.”
Let me be clear: I’m not judging anyone who invests time and money in skincare or cosmetic procedures. That’s your journey, and I respect it.
However, the constant obsession with filters, injections, and societal expectations makes it challenging to embrace the “aging gracefully” mindset. The overwhelming messages we encounter can distort our self-image, making it hard to feel comfortable in our own skin, and distract us from meaningful experiences like laughter and time spent with loved ones. A few weeks ago, I asked myself whether I’d rather spend money on cosmetic procedures or on travel adventures. The answer was clear: I choose travel every time.
So, I’m taking a leaf out of Justine Bateman’s book (literally). The next time I start stressing about the lines etched on my face or the resting grump face that comes with being in my 40s, I’ll remind myself: forget you, I look fabulous. Thanks, Justine!
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Summary
Justine Bateman has become an empowering figure, challenging societal beauty standards and encouraging women to embrace their age confidently. Through her book and interviews, she highlights the need to confront the fears associated with aging and reject the pressure to conform to unrealistic beauty norms. Her bold mantra of self-acceptance inspires women to prioritize authenticity over societal expectations.
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