How to De-Stress When Life Gets Overwhelming

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How to De-Stress When Life Gets Overwhelming

By Jamie Taylor

Updated: Sep. 29, 2021

Originally Published: March 29, 2021

Have you ever had someone say “just chill out”? The frustration that follows is totally understandable because unwinding isn’t as simple as it sounds—especially when you’re in the midst of chaos. It can feel like you’ve aged decades between the morning rush and the evening wind-down, and if you’re balancing parenting with work, it’s even more intense. To effectively “calm down,” you have to identify what’s stressing you out, recognize your triggers, and discover what relaxation methods actually work for you. Remember, not every stress-relief technique is effective for everyone.

The American Psychological Association identifies three types of stress:

Acute Stress

Acute Stress is usually triggered by specific events, like an impending project deadline.

Episodic Acute Stress

Episodic Acute Stress is what many parents experience; it’s that compounded feeling of being overwhelmed by multiple responsibilities—like juggling work deadlines, children’s activities, and relationship issues. You might find yourself labeled a “worrier.”

Chronic Stress

Chronic Stress is the most harmful and can stem from long-term issues such as abuse, homelessness, or unhealthy childhood environments. If you’re dealing with chronic stress, it’s important to consult a licensed mental health professional regularly.

For less severe stress, numerous techniques can help you relax. Below, we’ve compiled various methods to kickstart your journey to relaxation.

Immediate Relaxation Strategies

Sometimes you need quick techniques to calm down during stressful moments, like after a disagreement with a partner or while waiting for roadside assistance after a flat tire. Here are some quick fixes that require minimal effort:

Deep Breathing Exercises

Close your eyes and take slow, deep breaths to focus on your breathing pattern. If you need guidance, check out resources like Daniel Tiger’s helpful demonstrations.

Refocusing

Utilizing techniques from Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) can be beneficial. When emotions run high, it’s easy to spiral out of control. Ground yourself by identifying:

Three things you see
Three things you hear
Three things you smell
Three things you feel physically

Focused Muscle Relaxation

This technique involves tensing and relaxing different muscle groups. Start by creating tension (like clenching your fists or tensing your legs) and then breathe deeply as you release that tension, moving from one area of your body to another.

Jaw Relaxation

To relieve a common sign of stress—clenching your jaw—try this exercise:

Stand in front of a mirror and smile widely without straining.
With your smile, slightly open your jaw and inhale through your mouth.
As you exhale, relax your smile.

Repeat this about ten times.

Mantras and Positive Affirmations

Use mantras as calming phrases to repeat silently when stressed. For instance, if you’re anxious about a meeting, remind yourself, “I’m well-prepared for this.” When flying somewhere exciting, a simple affirmation like “I’m safe and will enjoy my trip” can help.

Planned Relaxation Techniques

When you have a bit more time to unwind after a tough few days, consider these options:

Meditation

Meditation can be similar to repeating a mantra, but typically involves longer sessions in a quiet space. There are numerous guided meditation resources available online, which can offer greater rewards.

Yoga

Yoga is adaptable for all body types and can be practiced at home or in classes. If the idea of a class feels stressful, explore YouTube for free sessions or look for affordable DVDs at local thrift shops.

Self-Care

Self-care means different things to different people. Whether it’s enjoying a long bath with a book or indulging in a mini-spa day at home, find what makes you feel cherished.

Engaging in Hobbies

While hobbies can also be sources of stress, dedicating time to something you love can foster relaxation. Consider activities like gardening or working on puzzles, which can offer a therapeutic escape.

Journaling

Writing can be a therapeutic outlet. Use a questions journal or simply jot down your thoughts and feelings. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, switch gears and start a gratitude journal to focus on the positive aspects of your life.

Forest Bathing

Spending time in nature has been shown to reduce stress and improve overall well-being. Whether you enjoy a walk in the woods or simply relaxing on your patio, fresh air can be incredibly rejuvenating.

Making a List

Documenting what you’re grateful for can shift your focus away from stress. List the little things in life that bring you joy, like a warm cup of coffee or a good book.

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Summary

Managing stress can feel overwhelming, but by identifying your triggers and exploring various relaxation techniques—both immediate and planned—you can find effective ways to unwind. From deep breathing and focused muscle relaxation to journaling and spending time in nature, there are numerous strategies to help you regain your calm.