How to Support Individuals with Mental Health Challenges

I consider myself fortunate. I live with bipolar 2 disorder, yet I am surrounded by understanding individuals. Dealing with mental illness is challenging enough; you often feel overlooked, judged, and not quite “enough” in today’s society—especially if, like me, you struggle to maintain a traditional work schedule. Mental illness can be incredibly isolating. Friendships may fade, and misunderstandings are common.

Being around those who are unfamiliar with moderate to severe mental health issues can exacerbate feelings of fear and uncertainty. You may find yourself dreading the moments when your condition becomes apparent: Will it be as severe this time? How will I manage alone? Such thoughts can cast a shadow over even the brightest days. It often feels like a lack of love—a failure to embrace the complete person.

Fortunately, my spouse recognizes that there will be times when I need him to come home from work because I’m overwhelmed by my medication routine. I’m grateful that his colleagues understand he has a wife dealing with mental health challenges; they don’t pry or ask unnecessary questions. My closest friends appreciate that I might suddenly go quiet. When that happens, they respect my need for space and know I’ll reach back out when I’m ready. My bosses actively encourage me to take mental health breaks and check in often. I am incredibly thankful for their support, which makes my life more manageable.

Supporting someone with mental illness requires a unique approach. While many want to help, they may not know how to do so effectively—unlike the people in my life, who have educated themselves on the topic. According to Johns Hopkins, around 26% of Americans face mental health issues annually, with 9.5% battling depression and 18% managing anxiety disorders. You likely know someone navigating these challenges. Here are some ways to provide support:

Acknowledge Their Mental Health Struggles

The people in my life don’t pretend my brain functions like everyone else’s. They recognize that I have bipolar 2 disorder, which influences how I respond to various situations. When I fall silent, my husband often asks, “Are you okay, or just quiet?” He gives me the opportunity to express myself and acknowledges that I may not feel alright.

Those who care for me accept my reality, including the tough moments when I’ve had to adjust to medication changes. They understand and embrace the full scope of my being.

Be Present When Needed

Offer your support. If you’re a close friend or partner, this might mean being there during challenging times—navigating the tears, sadness, and anger that can accompany mental illness. Sometimes, just being physically present is all that’s needed. During a difficult episode, I spent time with my friend Alex in his garage. We didn’t discuss my struggles; instead, we watched a couple of shows together. The simple act of being there made a significant difference.

The closer you are to someone experiencing mental health issues, the more you’ll witness their struggles. It’s essential to remember that this is only a part of who they are. Before they encounter difficulties, ask what type of support they need most. My husband and I improved our communication when he learned that I preferred him to listen rather than try to solve my problems.

Recognize That Mental Illness Can Alter Behavior

Sometimes, mental health challenges can lead individuals to behave in ways that seem out of character. It’s crucial to understand that this behavior stems from their condition, not their true self. While it may be tempting to point out discrepancies in their actions, it might be better to simply acknowledge the situation without confrontation.

For instance, before my last breakdown, I had an intense confrontation with my supervisor. She noted that my behavior was atypical. Looking back, I realized that this was an early warning sign of my impending crisis. Understanding these signals can help you respond more effectively in the future.

Maintain Your Composure

As a supportive friend or partner, it’s important to remain calm. This means avoiding arguments, refraining from crying alongside them, and, most importantly, practicing patience.

It’s not as simple as telling someone with mental health struggles to “snap out of it.” If we could, we would. Instead of expressing frustration, suggest alternative activities if they seem open to it. However, avoid telling them to stop their behavior or expressing that it annoys you—it’s often more distressing for them than you realize.

Understand Mental Health Like Physical Health

Mental illness can be exhausting. There may be times when individuals need to withdraw from social interactions. This is not a personal affront; they are conserving energy for essential tasks like eating or showering.

If someone you know is facing a mental health crisis, consider small acts of kindness, such as sending them a meal or a comforting treat. They are likely fatigued, and their loved ones may also be feeling drained from the emotional toll.

Most importantly, offer them space and understanding. Don’t judge them for their illness; recognize that they may sometimes need assistance or room to heal. We may not conform to societal expectations, but with your support, we can strive to be our best selves.

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Summary

Supporting friends or loved ones with mental health challenges necessitates understanding, compassion, and patience. Acknowledging their struggles, being present, recognizing changes in behavior, and maintaining calmness are key aspects of offering effective support. Just as with physical illnesses, mental health requires empathy and care to navigate the complexities of daily life.