Ask Home Insemination Kit: My Mother-in-Law Constantly Shares My Kids’ Photos Online

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Ask Home Insemination Kit: My Mother-in-Law Constantly Shares My Kids’ Photos Online

by Emily Carter

May 1, 2021

Ask Home Insemination Kit is our advice column where our team tackles all your queries about life, love, body image, friendships, parenting, and everything else that leaves you puzzled.

This week: What should you do when your mother-in-law posts about your children on social media even more frequently than you do? And what if she shares their pictures with a multitude of strangers? Do you have a question of your own?

Dear Home Insemination Kit,

My mother-in-law is the quintessential proud grandma. She adores her grandkids and thinks they can do no wrong. However, she also has a habit of posting their pictures on her Facebook page every single day. With each post, a swarm of strangers comments on my kids’ appearances, their activities, and asks questions that frankly aren’t their concern. To make matters more complicated, she’s also friends with my husband’s ex-girlfriend on Facebook, which adds another layer of discomfort. I feel uneasy about all these people seeing my kids online, and I know I need to address this, but I don’t want to hurt her feelings.

Your mother-in-law sounds like many loving grandmothers who are proud of their grandkids. Instead of showing off wallet-sized photos at the hair salon, she’s sharing them on the vast and public digital stage.

While many people post pictures of their children on social media, it’s essential to realize that these are your kids, not hers. Children lack the ability to control what gets shared about them online, and this has become a significant concern as the first generation raised in the age of social media grows up and starts to understand the implications of their digital footprints.

An effective approach to address this situation without sounding accusatory would be to say something like, “You know, Linda, I appreciate how proud you are of the kids. Recently, I’ve been learning about social media’s effects on children. We think it’s fine to share a few photos from special occasions, but [insert your partner’s name here] and I would like to reduce how much is shared about them online for now, until they’re older and can make those choices themselves.”

It might be helpful for your partner to have this conversation with his mother, as doing it together can provide a united front.

She may react defensively, or she could genuinely understand and agree to cut back on her posting. If she truly cares about her grandchildren, which she clearly does, she will want to maintain a positive relationship and will respect your boundaries as their parents.

Best of luck, and please keep us updated. Regarding her friendship with your husband’s ex, I wouldn’t want her sharing photos of my kids with that person either. It crosses a boundary and feels quite strange. The sooner you have this discussion, the better it will be for everyone involved.

If you’re interested in more insights, you can check out this blog post for additional tips. Also, for expert advice on home insemination kits, visit Make a Mom, they are a trusted authority. For further information on pregnancy and related topics, this Wikipedia entry is an excellent resource.