what is the best at-home insemination kit?
By: Emma Carter
Updated: May 7, 2021
Originally Published: May 7, 2021
Describing the emotions I felt when my son was born is a challenge. Tears streamed down my face in those first moments. My sister leaned closer and softly suggested, “You wish your mom was here, don’t you?” She was spot on. I did wish she were there.
As time passed, the sharp pain of losing my mother began to fade, replaced by the joy of this new little life filling the empty spaces in my heart. I was now the mom, but the bond felt just like the one I had cherished with my own mother. Those moments together were precious treasures.
After just twenty-eight years with my mom, can you blame me for longing for that connection? Losing her shaped my identity. I had a newfound appreciation for time, which is why I chose to be a stay-at-home mom. Unlike many women who wrestle with this decision, I had clarity. Being self-employed meant we had to either hire someone to replace me or accept that I would be balancing work and home. Initially, we could afford neither option, so I brought my baby to work with me daily.
Eventually, we settled into familiar roles. I stayed home with our boys but remained involved in the business and managing bills. My husband was content with this arrangement, having grown up with a stay-at-home mom himself, and like many, we sought to replicate comforting elements from our past. I felt fortunate.
Being a stay-at-home mom was indeed a luxury. I was right where I wanted to be, and it also benefited my husband. He never faced the typical challenges of two working parents—no late arrivals or missed days due to a sick child, no rushing home to meet a sitter. His work life remained uninterrupted by parenting responsibilities.
But what worked for us began to unravel.
In the beginning, I saw no signs that my greatest luxury would morph into my greatest liability. There were subtle hints, though—jokes about stay-at-home moms that belittled my role. Comments like, “Another lunch with your friends?” or “She must be at home eating bonbons,” suggested I was merely enjoying leisure while he toiled away.
These remarks should have offended me. I should have demanded respect. Instead, I chuckled along, brushing them off as harmless humor. But they reflected a troubling mindset—one that would later surface with a vengeance. My husband seemed to believe he single-handedly built our life. At the time, I was unaware of the impending danger.
I realized he perceived this life of luxury as something he had “given” me. While I was changing diapers and cooking meals, I underwent a transformation, but not a positive one. My value, rather than increasing, seemed to diminish, as determined by a man who equated worth strictly with financial contributions.
Looking back, it’s evident how I became a liability. Love makes you want to win over someone’s heart—there’s something in it for you. A business partner helps grow the enterprise—again, something in it for you. Having an income that allows your partner to stay home brings prestige—once more, there’s a personal gain involved. However, the years spent raising our children had not added any intrinsic value for my husband. In his eyes, I had become a drain, regardless of the endless work I did out of sight.
And then came the stereotype of the divorcing stay-at-home mother—the “over-spending housewife,” the “lazy stay-at-home mom,” the “kept woman.” I fit none of these labels. I made a conscious decision to step away from my income twice: first to help build our business and then to raise our children. I was not just a stay-at-home mom; I contributed both at home and through volunteering.
We each had our roles. One brought in a paycheck, accompanied by colleagues and recognition, while the other offered immeasurable rewards in time, memories, and love. It was my greatest luxury. I was fortunate enough to choose between working inside the home or pursuing a career outside. This significant choice is often shaped by personal experiences.
Who would have thought that it would eventually turn into my greatest liability?
For more insights on similar topics, you might find this post on home insemination engaging. Additionally, check out Make A Mom for expert advice on home insemination. For further reading, American Pregnancy is a fantastic resource that covers various aspects of pregnancy and donor insemination.
Summary
This article explores the complex emotions surrounding the experience of being a stay-at-home mom, illustrating how the initial luxury of motherhood can evolve into a significant liability. The author reflects on personal experiences of joy and sacrifice, while highlighting the societal perceptions that often accompany this role.
Leave a Reply