9 ’80s Songs That Capture the Experience of Raising My Teen Daughter

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Navigating the tumultuous teenage years with my daughter, I often find myself reflecting on my own adolescence in the ’80s. As I journey through this phase, I’m discovering that while it is a bit easier than the challenging tween years, raising a teen girl still comes with its own unique hurdles. I’ve learned to balance my desire to support her with the need to let her grow independently, celebrating her victories while helping her learn from her mistakes. Here are nine iconic ’80s songs that resonate with my experiences as a parent to a teenage girl today:

1. Duran Duran, ‘Girls on Film’
   In today’s digital age, it’s more about Snapchat than traditional film. My nearly 14-year-old daughter constantly snaps selfies, sharing them with her friends. Some photos are intentionally unflattering, while others radiate beauty. I remind her that anything posted online can be permanent, but she assures me she knows, then continues to take her shots.
2. The Clash, ‘Should I Stay or Should I Go’
   Determining when my daughter needs my assistance and when she prefers to tackle challenges on her own is a delicate balance. I often find myself hovering but understand that learning to navigate life independently is crucial for her growth. I’m becoming more attuned to her cues about when she needs guidance versus when she’s ready to handle things solo.
3. Madonna, ‘Like a Virgin’
   Our conversations about relationships and sex are frequent and candid, far more than I ever had with my mother. While part of me wants to advocate for abstinence, the reality of teenage hormones leads us to discuss the complexities of these experiences, including consent, safety, and emotional connections. It’s uncomfortable at times, but essential for her understanding.
4. Rob Base & DJ E-Z Rock, ‘Joy and Pain’
   My daughter has come a long way in managing her emotions, yet she still experiences intense feelings—both joyful and painful. Her reactions can be dramatic, whether she’s ecstatic about a good grade or overwhelmed by disappointment. Celebrating her achievements often leads to spontaneous expressions of joy, like cartwheeling in the yard.
5. AC/DC, ‘Back in Black’
   Gone are the days of pastel princess dresses; I now have a teenager who embraces dark, edgy fashion. Her wardrobe is filled with black leggings, distressed jeans, and monochromatic tops. It’s a striking contrast to her childhood style, and while I ponder if this is a phase or a permanent look, she carries it off with confidence.
6. Pet Shop Boys, ‘What Have I Done to Deserve This?’
   When my daughter reacts sharply to minor issues, such as forgetting a napkin or a reminder about her ride, I often wonder what I’ve done to provoke such behavior. A quick reflection reminds me that this is typical teenage behavior, not a personal affront. Understanding that her reactions are part of her developmental phase helps me remain calm.
7. Salt-N-Pepa, ‘Push It’
   Setting boundaries for a teenager is a whole new challenge. For instance, when my daughter requests a late-night pickup after making plans with friends, I must reinforce our existing rules. Although I appreciate her resourcefulness, it’s my role to maintain the limits we’ve established, while she learns to negotiate them.
8. Simple Minds, ‘Don’t You (Forget About Me)’
   In her quest for independence, my daughter sometimes forgets that I’m a valuable resource. Whether she’s facing academic or emotional challenges, I encourage her to remember that she can always seek my support. I remind her that I’ve been in her shoes and am here to offer guidance whenever she needs it.
9. Guns N’ Roses, ‘Sweet Child O’ Mine’
   Despite the ups and downs of parenting a teen, I always cherish the essence of the sweet child she has grown from. As she navigates the complexities of adolescence, I’m reminded of the heart of gold that still resides within her.

Raising a teenage girl is an unpredictable journey, but with open communication—whether through selfies, discussions about relationships, or the occasional hug—I’m confident we’ll navigate this phase together. Maybe I’ll even create her a mixtape of these iconic songs to celebrate our unique bond.

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Summary:

This article explores the challenges and joys of raising a teenage daughter through the lens of beloved ’80s songs. From navigating fashion choices to discussing relationships, the piece illustrates the evolving dynamic between mother and daughter, highlighting the importance of communication and support throughout adolescence.