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When I re-entered the workforce after spending thirteen years as a stay-at-home mom, I struggled to separate work from my personal life. I thought it was acceptable to respond to emails during dinner or send pitches while I was shopping in the baking aisle. Instead of designating specific times for work, I made myself constantly accessible. I didn’t take a break for three years and blurred the lines between workdays and weekends, creating an endless work cycle.
Initially, I justified my behavior by wanting to demonstrate my dedication. I believed that quickly answering a call or responding to an email wouldn’t take much time. But I soon realized that this mindset was flawed. One distraction led to another, and before I knew it, family dinners were lost to my phone.
It took me a while to understand that being available on a Saturday afternoon didn’t mean I had to work. Just because an email arrived at midnight didn’t mean I had to respond before my feet hit the floor in the morning. Before reaching this understanding, I became irritable and disorganized, making careless mistakes at work. I wasn’t focused on my work, my time with my kids, or my friendships. I often found myself in conversations with friends, saying, “Just a moment, I need to email my editor quickly.” There were numerous occasions when I arrived at my boyfriend’s house absorbed in my phone, completely unaware of how it affected him.
A few years ago, I began canceling a weekly lunch date with a friend to focus on work. She finally pointed out, “We meet for just 45 minutes once a week. You really can’t make time for that?” As a labor and delivery nurse, she shared a recent experience where they nearly lost a patient. She reminded me, “You need to step away from work to be better at it.” She was right.
Constant availability can be draining and detrimental to mental health. It’s essential to remember that just because we can do something doesn’t mean we should. The Muse offers a useful suggestion: evaluate requests based on their impact on your schedule, well-being, and goals. For those who tend to please others, this may be challenging, but it will help you prioritize what truly matters.
Before accepting every request at work, consider telling your colleagues you’ll respond later. This approach allows you to assess your calendar and set expectations that you won’t be immediately available for every request.
Our careers resemble our personal relationships; people will ask for favors if they think we’ll agree. While we are obligated to work hard and perform well, it doesn’t mean we have to be available around the clock. Will answering that email at 10 p.m. instead of the next day make a significant difference? Do you really want to accept that additional project if it means sacrificing time with family or a vacation? Without occasional breaks or the ability to say no, no one benefits—especially not those trying to juggle too much.
Once I began setting aside specific blocks of time for work, family, and myself, I discovered that it was okay to let things wait. I didn’t lose any ground in my career; my family was happier, and my work became more productive without the weight of overwhelm. When work becomes part of your life instead of dominating it, you’ll find you can accomplish more during those designated hours.
So, consider your current situation. Are you delegating enough? Have you shared your feelings with your boss and colleagues? Are you aware of where you spend most of your time and where you’d prefer to invest it?
Balancing your career doesn’t mean saying yes to everything or being perpetually available. That mindset is a recipe for stagnation. You can’t progress if you’re always worried about falling behind.
For more insights, you can read about the importance of time management in this related piece on home insemination. Additionally, if you’re interested in resources on artificial insemination, check out this at-home kit and the NHS’s information on intrauterine insemination.
Summary
Finding a balance between work and personal life is essential for mental well-being. Being available all the time can lead to burnout and strained relationships. Setting boundaries, prioritizing tasks, and taking breaks can improve both productivity and personal happiness.
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