What I’ve Learned From Marrying Young: Insights From Eighteen Years Together

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This week marks a significant milestone for my partner and me — we’ve been together for eighteen wonderful years. Our journey began when we went on our first date at the tender age of eighteen. Having spent half of our lives in love, we grew up together, sharing experiences that shaped who we are today. Our early relationship was rooted in our youth and strong religious beliefs, which meant neither of us had engaged in serious dating before we met. From the moment he took my hand, I knew I never wanted to hold another hand again; he was my man. I had an inexplicable feeling that he would grow into everything I needed, and I’ve never regretted marrying young.

When we declared our love for the long haul, we were blissfully unaware of the world and even ourselves. Yet, we felt that together, we could achieve all our dreams — as long as we were a team. Thankfully, we were right. He has made me a true believer in soul mates. Together, we create a harmony that exceeds the sum of our individual selves.

Of course, spending a lifetime with one person isn’t without its hurdles. Teenagers lack fully developed brains, which led us to make some baffling decisions in our early years. Even as we navigated our twenties, we were still quite juvenile in many respects. But we persevered.

Relationship Lessons We’ve Learned

Here are some relationship lessons we’ve picked up along the way, along with insights from other lifelong couples like us:

  1. Open Communication is Essential
    As Faith G. puts it, “We were dedicated to communicating so much that it possibly became annoying. Every hard conversation was addressed, and those early discussions helped us navigate darker times together.”
  2. Learning to Fight Fair
    In our early days, we often pushed each other’s buttons to ‘win’ arguments, leading to days of silence and resentment. Now, with nearly two decades of experience, we’ve learned to disagree without descending into chaos and to value sincere apologies. Our life isn’t perfect, but it’s harmonious because we respect boundaries, even in conflict.
  3. Sex: Important but Not Everything
    Emily, a wife and mother of nearly 20 years, says, “You don’t have to have a lot of sex, but being aligned on the subject is crucial. Different sex drives are common, but maintaining open dialogue can prevent uncomfortable feelings.”
  4. Seek Reasons to Stay, Not Leave
    My husband believes, “If both partners are genuinely committed, any marriage can work. It requires countless conversations, active listening, and perseverance through tough times. If love exists and no one is being dishonest, minor disagreements are manageable.”
  5. Negative Experiences Can Teach Valuable Lessons
    Clara G. reflects on a challenging moment in her marriage, saying, “Early on, my husband kissed someone else. I chose to stay, believing he was a good man who made a mistake. His regret transformed him into a better person, and our relationship grew stronger. I learned that my bad feelings taught me about forgiveness and resilience.”
  6. Embrace Change
    Rita T. emphasizes the importance of accepting that your partner will evolve. “When you marry young, you both go through various life phases together. My husband and I have changed significantly since we were 19, but we’ve been fortunate to continue liking each other through those transformations.”
  7. Youth Doesn’t Justify Poor Behavior
    Healthy relationships are possible at any age. Young people can and should cultivate loving, respectful partnerships. Abusive behavior, regardless of age, is unacceptable. The moment someone crosses the line into abuse, they forfeit their right to be in your life.

I could share many more lessons from my journey. Marrying young has provided me with countless opportunities for personal and relational growth. Regardless of when you meet your soulmate, nurturing a loving relationship is a skill that can be developed — age is merely a number. For more insights related to home insemination, check out this post here.

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In summary, marrying young has brought both challenges and profound learning experiences. Open communication, mutual respect, and a willingness to grow together are crucial for any relationship’s success, regardless of age.


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