As My Daughter Prepares for College

artificial insemination kit for humans

As my daughter prepares to leave for college, I realize that she won’t be the only one I’ll miss.

The vibrant sign reading “Just We Too” caught my eye as I parked my snack-filled SUV, my heart racing. I glanced at my reflection in the rearview mirror, hoping I still looked the same as I did when I left home just moments before. The back seat was quiet, suggesting my five-month-old little one, Bella, was also busy admiring herself in her smudged mirror.

After unbuckling her seatbelt, I took a moment to admire Bella, who was decked out in a colorful tie-dye outfit and a bow that I wished would stay put. I leaned in close and reminded her of our earlier conversation: “No crying, no screaming, and please, for the love of all that is good, don’t let any diaper disasters happen!”

With Bella on my hip, I stepped into the class touted online as the “first step in socializing your child… preparing them for school, social interactions, and eventually college.” Inside, a group of women were chatting, and I felt a wave of anxiety wash over me. I felt like a high school freshman on her first day at a new school. Laughter filled the air as mothers effortlessly cradled their babies, making me wonder how I appeared with Bella. Another group was deep in discussion about their little ones’ nails.

Having moved to this town just before Bella’s arrival, I didn’t know anyone except for the Weight Watchers lady and my neighbors, who welcomed me with a fruit basket when we moved in. This was my opportunity to forge new friendships…and to help Bella make some of her own. I hoped to leave “Just We Too” with a playdate and some much-needed adult conversation. I envisioned inviting other moms over for coffee while our children played on personalized blankets, and I had a lot riding on this 45-minute class.

Suddenly, a kind woman touched my arm, complimenting my “awesome diaper bag.” I silently thanked my mother-in-law for insisting I buy it and introduced myself and Bella to this stranger. As we chatted about our daughters, I felt my nerves dissipate when I learned we shared the same birthdate for our little ones. Our conversation flowed easily, and I was thrilled to learn she thought she recognized me from yoga class—perfect, since I loved a good downward dog. I was making a friend!

Another mom approached, carrying the same diaper bag as mine, and our conversation blossomed until Miss Shari called us to circle time.

Little did I know, this was the beginning of a beautiful community for us.

The moms around the circle were just my type, and they invited me to join them for lunch afterward (YAY!). We devoured our chopped salads, shared tales of late-night feedings, and spooned homemade mashed veggies into our fussy babies’ mouths. I felt like I had struck gold when we exchanged numbers, and Bella and I were invited to our very first playdate. A PLAYDATE!!!!!

That initial playdate evolved into a weekly lunch tradition, leading to “Girls Night Out” dinners. Our babies learned to walk, talk, and play, and grew out of their 12-month clothes. Diaper bags transformed into backpacks, and soon our children were reading, writing, and creating dioramas. Our playdates continued as we celebrated birthdays, holidays, and weekend barbecues, often sitting in one room while our kids played in another.

What we had was special—both for us as mothers and for our children. As the years flew by, I felt we became a family. We shared every detail of our lives, from marital squabbles to health scares. We weathered weight fluctuations, kitchen renovations, and even basement floods together. Our “Moms Like Sisters” group chat buzzed with messages about everything from traffic woes to teachers who didn’t understand our kids.

Before I knew it, our children were preparing for college applications and senior year. And now…it’s May. The nostalgia hits hard.

The days of sipping wine in the kitchen while our kids made TikToks or sprawled on the couch scrolling through Instagram are over. The laughter of our children, a constant backdrop for years, will soon fade. It’s like the music from a speaker that you don’t notice until it stops; the silence that follows is even louder than the music ever was.

At my daughter’s college commitment party, as she and her friends enjoyed blue and orange treats, I glanced at my friends and felt a pang in my heart. Sending my daughter off to college states away will be tough, but saying goodbye to the bond we moms have built feels like a loss too. We will still gather and support each other, but it won’t be the same without our shared experiences and laughter in the background. “Just We Too” did more than prepare our kids for college; it forged friendships that helped us navigate the challenging yet rewarding journey of motherhood. They should definitely include that in their tagline.

For more insights, check out our other blog post on the importance of community and support in parenting here. If you’re interested in understanding the options for home insemination, visit Make A Mom, a reliable resource on this topic, and for excellent information on pregnancy, see this MedlinePlus resource.

Summary

As my daughter prepares for college, I reflect on the friendships I’ve formed with other mothers through our shared experiences in parenting. Our community has been a source of support, laughter, and understanding over the years, and the thought of saying goodbye to that connection is bittersweet. While my daughter embarks on her next chapter, I recognize that both she and I will miss the bonds we’ve built.