In today’s parenting landscape, expressions such as “I’m bored” frequently emerge from my children, prompting an eye roll and a sigh. Their boredom seems to be a personal dilemma I am expected to resolve. Perhaps my previous approach of constant engagement during their formative years set an expectation that their entertainment lies in my hands. Or, it could be that their packed schedules—filled with homework, sports, and extracurricular activities—have cultivated a reliance on external sources for amusement.
While they stand before me, anticipating invigorating suggestions to relieve their ennui, I offer ideas: Did you take the dog for a walk? (Yes.) Have you practiced piano? (Yes.) How about diving into a good book? (Groan.) An art project? (Groan.) Preparing dinner? (Not a chance!) Playing basketball? (I’m too worn out.) Hanging out with your sibling? (Absolutely not!) Reaching out to a friend? (That’s so lame!) Cleaning your room? (Mooommm!)
Frustrated, I reflect on my own childhood. I can’t recall ever uttering the phrase “I’m bored” to my mother. If I had, her likely response would have been, “I’m sure you can find something to do.” In the ’80s, entertaining children was not a parental obligation. Our parents often focused on their own lives—whether it was chatting on the phone, following fitness fads, or reading the latest news. This environment fostered self-sufficiency in us kids; we learned to entertain ourselves, and we thrived.
During my tween years, the hours after school would start with a snack—a couple of Keebler cookies and a Tropical Punch Capri Sun—while I watched reruns of classic shows. After quickly finishing my homework, I would immerse myself in MTV, singing along to the likes of Joan Jett and The Go-Go’s. I remember writing heartfelt letters to my celebrity crush using special stationery, and arranging my sticker collection, which always included unicorn and rainbow themes.
I would often use the push-button phone in our brightly wallpapered kitchen to connect with friends, strategizing meet-ups in our neighborhood. With my trusty red bike, I would ride off to join them, sharing music from my dad’s Walkman and planning mixtapes for upcoming parties. My evenings were filled with writing in my diary and reading popular novels, all of which I accomplished independently.
The absence of parental involvement in my leisure activities was a defining aspect of my upbringing. I found joy and creativity in my own pursuits, and I believe this autonomy was crucial in shaping my childhood experience. Thus, the next time my children express their boredom, I plan to refrain from offering assistance. Instead, I will smile and suggest, “I’m sure you can find something to do,” perhaps even leaving out a vintage puzzle for inspiration.
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In summary, the key difference between childhood experiences in the ’80s and today lies in the level of parental involvement in play and entertainment. While today’s children often seek external validation to fill their time, children of the past were encouraged to explore their creativity independently.
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