I Took the Plunge: My First Brazilian Waxing Experience

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“Alright, now pull your knees up to your chest. It’s time for the butt strips!”

How did I end up here? Is this really happening? Just two days earlier, I had a chat with my friend Lisa, who casually mentioned her routine of visiting a salon every 4-6 weeks for a Brazilian wax.

“You just lie there, exposed… for a STRANGER? But I haven’t done that since my college days!” I exclaimed, incredulous. Lisa loves it, her husband appreciates it, and she’s been doing it for a decade. She encouraged me to book an appointment, but I immediately shot her down, saying, “No way, I could never do that.” We both laughed, but inside, I started to wonder: is this a rite of passage for women, especially moms, that I just didn’t get the memo about?

In my mind, Brazilian waxes were reserved for young, fit models. Could a 40-something, plus-sized mom of five really go through with it? Is this something for women with post-baby bodies? Should I really consider it?

With my heart racing, I turned to Google, where I typed in my most absurd questions:

• “Can a fat person get a Brazilian wax?”
• “Can someone with a FUPA get a Brazilian wax?”
• “Will they ask me to move my fupa during the process?”
• “What if I break the table?”
• “Do I have to get on all fours?”
• “What if I fart?”

You get the idea.

To my surprise, I discovered that people of all shapes, sizes, and ages get waxed every day. Men, women, young, old—everyone! It’s a common part of many hygiene routines. Facing the reality of my razor burn and ingrown hairs, I decided it was time to take the plunge. I quickly booked an appointment at a well-known waxing chain for the next day. If I didn’t act fast, I’d probably back out. After all, you only live once, right? So why not experience having all my hair ripped out while I simultaneously leave my dignity at the door? Let’s do this!

Twelve hours later, I found myself sitting in the parking lot of the salon.

“What are you doing? Just go home! They’re going to laugh at you! This is going to hurt!”

Deep breaths. I finally mustered the courage to walk inside. I told the receptionist that I was a Brazilian waxing virgin. She greeted me with a bright smile and said, “Wonderful! This will change your life! You’ll leave here feeling like a new woman!”

I struggled to understand how looking like a Sphynx cat could be life-altering, but I was ready for the adventure. A few minutes later, I was led to a waxing room by my new best friend, Mia.

Mia reassured me that I had a normal body and that she sees all types of bodies every day. She radiated warmth, and I began to feel safe. Time to drop my pants and hop onto the table—thankfully, it didn’t break.

Mia patiently explained the process. When necessary, she asked me to hold my skin taut or lift my fupa out of the way. It wasn’t awkward, and I didn’t feel judged at all. To my surprise, the pain was minimal. I wouldn’t say the sensation of having my hair pulled out was “fun,” but it certainly wasn’t terrible. The wax was warm, and as we chatted about our summer plans, I learned we vacation at the same beach!

“Okay, pull your knees up to your chest; it’s time for the butt strips!”

I covered my eyes and cringed. She was about to see parts of me that I wasn’t even sure my husband had seen! Was I really going to let Mia wax my butt? Yes, and surprisingly, it wasn’t bad at all. And guess what? I didn’t fart!

All done, I put my underwear back on, still processing what had just happened. Back in the waiting room, the cheerful receptionist asked, “Wasn’t it wonderful? Don’t you feel amazing?”

The entire appointment lasted under 15 minutes, but it felt like a blur. I left feeling surprisingly sexy and clean, with a newfound confidence and a skip in my step. Was it worth it? Absolutely. I swiped my card and signed up for 12 more sessions.

“See you in four weeks, Mia! My new best friend!”

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Summary:

This humorous account details my first experience getting a Brazilian wax, revealing my initial fears and anxieties about the process. After a supportive and non-judgmental experience with the esthetician, I emerged feeling confident and empowered. This newfound sense of self led me to book multiple sessions, proving that sometimes stepping out of your comfort zone can lead to surprisingly positive outcomes.