Ask Home Insemination Kit: An Old Friend Slid Into My DMs, And Now I’m in a Complicated Situation

Welcome to the Home Insemination Kit advice column, where we tackle your questions about life, love, relationships, and all those tricky situations that can arise.

This week: What should you do when you’re happily married but find yourself drawn to someone else?

Dear Home Insemination Kit,

I’d like to share a bit of context first: My partner and I have been together for 13 years, and I’m confident we both consider our marriage to be strong and loving. I’m currently expecting our fourth child, due in the fall.

However, I think I’m developing a significant crush on a high school friend. We’ve been connected on social media for a long time, but over the past six months, our conversations have intensified through direct messages. It all kicked off after he commented on a picture of my kids I posted on social media. Now, we chat constantly, and I genuinely enjoy it. We share a lot of interests, share laughs, and have meaningful exchanges.

While we haven’t done anything physically inappropriate, we both understand that our growing closeness wouldn’t sit well with our spouses. So, I’m left wondering what to do next. I have no intentions of leaving my partner, but I’m also not keen on cutting off this friendship. We both recognize there’s an emotional bond forming, which feels inappropriate for two married individuals.

We don’t live far apart, and the only thing preventing us from meeting is my pregnancy. I fear that if we were to meet, we might cross a line, and I’m not willing to jeopardize my current relationship. I know this isn’t a healthy foundation for any type of relationship, yet my thoughts keep drifting toward him. I can’t imagine living with this secret for much longer, as it seems unfair to my wonderful partner. What should I do? I can’t confide in my friends because they know both of us and like his wife.

Sincerely, Conflicted and Confused