Growing up in the 1980s was an experience that shaped my identity in ways that only those who lived through the decade can truly comprehend. I often find myself feeling a sense of superiority when I hear those flannel-clad 1990s kids boast about their grunge music, or when a Millennial extols the virtues of auto-tune. The ’80s represented a unique era where life felt like it was pulled straight from a John Hughes film, with all its awkwardness and exaggerated flair. It was a time of extremes, from fashion to music, where even my shoulder pads reflected that vibrancy.
But my fondness for the ’80s goes beyond mere nostalgia; it stems from the fact that I was a teenager during that time. Teenagers, by nature, often lack wisdom. They don ridiculous outfits, communicate in monosyllabic grunts, and believe they’ve created the latest fashion trends. What those young people don’t realize is that in two decades, they will look back at old photos with a mix of embarrassment and disbelief. Fortunately, we ’80s teens had the luxury of being foolish without the digital footprint of social media. We could indulge in our antics privately, sparing us from the perpetual reminder of our cringe-worthy choices.
One of my more embarrassing habits was repeatedly practicing my signature as “Mrs. Alex Johnson” on my school binder. After my youthful infatuation with pop icon Andy Gibb, I transitioned to having a crush on the fictional heartthrob from Sixteen Candles, Alex Johnson. I was convinced that we were destined for matrimony, so I diligently honed my married signature—thankfully, I spared my towels from a monogram.
Step aerobics was another adventure I undertook. It was a fun way to get fit while clad in neon Lycra, until my knees began to protest like an old hinge. The most memorable moment was when I tripped over the step in front of the entire class. It was a workout that could only be rivaled by the notorious ThighMaster, which I also attempted, much to my embarrassment.
My bedroom was a shrine to the supermodels of the era; I plastered my walls with glossy photos of Cindy, Christy, Naomi, and Linda, the stars of George Michael’s music videos. I spent countless hours practicing my supermodel strut, which typically ended with me stumbling over the shag carpet in my childhood home.
Then there were the double polo shirts. Yes, I was one of those individuals who wore two polo shirts with the collars flipped up. My high school nickname was “Double Polo,” a title I wore like a badge of honor, despite the unnecessary volume of fabric.
During my preppy phase, my wardrobe consisted solely of pink and gray. I was so committed to this color scheme that my mother had to help me dye pennies gray to match my pink penny loafers. At one point, I was practically a walking advertisement for Esprit, so much so that I could have passed for an employee, much to my mother’s chagrin.
The leg warmer trend was another fad I embraced, despite growing up in sunny California where such attire was impractical. My legs were always warm, but at the cost of excessive sweat. Nevertheless, I thought I looked fabulous.
I also succumbed to the perm trend, resulting in hair that resembled “Shirley Temple on Red Bull.” The unmistakable scent of an ’80s perm made me grateful for the fact that they were ever allowed, although the results were often less than desirable.
As a devoted concert-goer, I dreamed of being a backup singer for Sting. When he went solo and performed in my town, I was captivated—not by him, but by his synchronized backup singers. I often practiced my routine in front of the mirror, fantasizing about a college major in backup singing—if only I could carry a tune!
With shoulder pads, sweater dresses, and plastic accessories defining our style, the fashion of the ’80s was undeniably bold and extravagant. While it may have involved flammable synthetic materials, it was also incredibly memorable. If you’ve ever experienced the horror of a misplaced shoulder pad, you know the struggle was real.
While the children of the 1990s can recite every Nirvana lyric and Millennials hold Taylor Swift in high regard, we ’80s kids can take pride in the fact that we navigated a world of fashion faux pas without the burden of social media documentation. We enjoyed the freedom to be silly and carefree, without the constant reminder of our past selves in moon boots and shoulder pads. Respect.
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In conclusion, our experiences as ’80s teens were both unique and formative, allowing us to embrace our quirks in a way that remains unforgettable.
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