I’m one of those people who firmly believes that everything happens for a reason. I feel like I have a specific purpose here, and that purpose is to be a mom. I never dreamt of climbing the corporate ladder or becoming a doctor; my aspirations were simple: changing diapers, making bottles, and creating art with my kids. My heart is full, and I feel incredibly grateful for my children. However, I must admit that I don’t want to embrace that mom role every single day. And you know what? That’s completely okay.
Like many mothers, I have my struggles. There have been times when I’ve stepped into the bathroom in tears, needing a moment alone from the chaos. I can recall greeting my partner at the door with my car keys in hand, ready for a quick getaway. There are mornings when I consider pretending to be sick just to avoid the breakfast mess that follows. Motherhood is a challenging journey, and it requires a lot of strength.
As I entered my forties with four kids at home, I found that although this was my lifelong dream, the constant demands were more draining than I anticipated. In my previous jobs, I could leave work behind at the end of the day. But motherhood? It’s a 24/7 commitment. Even if you work outside the home, the responsibilities do not disappear. If your child falls ill at daycare, you are still the one who must step in. This unending responsibility can be exhausting.
Motherhood often means losing a bit of your former self. While we might wish to maintain our pre-kid identities, the truth is that having children transforms us. The moment you connect with your child, whether in a delivery room or through adoption, you become someone new, filled with a desire to give selflessly. Often, the need for self-care and personal desires gets pushed aside.
It’s important to recognize that feeling overwhelmed doesn’t make you a bad mom; it’s part of being a typical parent. We all hit a wall from time to time, and sometimes it’s not pretty. I don’t like that my kids can bring me to tears when they ignore me. I dislike feeling so frazzled that I can’t even write a simple note. Losing your temper is certainly not admirable, but it’s also a common experience. Children know how to push our buttons and will do so relentlessly.
So what do you do on those days when you just don’t feel like being a mom? Taking a break is perfectly valid. You don’t need to escape to a hotel; sometimes a mental reset is all you need. If that means serving cereal for dinner, so be it. Maybe you just need a long shower or a lazy day in pajamas. If you don’t carve out time for yourself, it can spiral into something worse.
One of the best pieces of advice I can offer—something I often need to remind myself—is to take social media with a grain of salt. Even my posts can be misleading. I share beautiful pictures of my family, but those images often come from a series of attempts where someone wasn’t cooperating. Family vacations are rarely as peaceful as they appear, and school photos typically involve a fair share of tears. Remember, you’re only seeing a highlight reel.
If you find yourself not wanting to be a mom every day, that’s okay. Just make sure you come back to it. Seeking professional help is also perfectly fine. Talking to a counselor has been incredibly helpful for me. While she can’t fix my home life, she helps me navigate the challenges and prioritize my well-being. Each day is a fresh start, and reminding yourself that you are a good mom—even when you need a break—is crucial. Your kids love you, flaws and all. They simply want your presence, your hugs, and your support.
We won’t always be at our best. There will be days, weeks, and even months when things feel overwhelming. I know I’ll face moments of doubt about my parenting journey. My kids aren’t perfect, and neither am I. It’s vital to extend grace to everyone in your family, especially yourself.
For more insights on parenting, check out these resources:
Search Queries:
- How to manage stress as a new mom
- Signs you need a break from parenting
- Self-care tips for mothers
- How to balance work and motherhood
- Finding support as a stay-at-home mom
Summary:
This article explores the complexities of motherhood, acknowledging that it is normal for moms to feel overwhelmed and in need of a break. It emphasizes the importance of self-care, understanding that even devoted mothers can experience moments of doubt and frustration. Seeking help and taking time for oneself are essential for maintaining a healthy balance in parenting.
Leave a Reply