I can hardly believe that my children are about to return to school in just a week. This summer flew by, and now I find myself organizing school supplies, cleaning backpacks, and attending orientation sessions. My inbox fills daily with updates about bus schedules, policy changes, and friendly reminders. The carefree days of summer are giving way to yet another year of navigating education amidst a pandemic.
Unlike previous years, where I meticulously monitored my kids’ academic performance and regularly communicated with their teachers, this year will look quite different. After everything we’ve experienced over the past year and a half, I’ve come to realize that our children’s mental health and overall wellbeing should take precedence over their academic achievements. This year, I’m committed to reducing academic expectations and ensuring my children are genuinely okay, both mentally and emotionally.
We have all faced significant challenges. From the confusion of remote and in-person learning to debates about masks and vaccines, and the loss of extracurricular activities, it’s been overwhelming. Teachers have risen to the occasion as unsung heroes, stepping into roles they never anticipated. They, too, have been swept away by the chaos of new expectations.
Through remote learning, many parents learned firsthand that teaching is no easy task. Educators are often overworked and underappreciated, and the experience gave us a glimpse into their daily realities.
With that insight, I want to share a vital message: Parents, let’s take a step back this year. The most crucial aspect of our children’s lives isn’t their academic knowledge or test scores. They haven’t fallen behind in any meaningful sense—behind who exactly? We need to show understanding and compassion towards our children, who have experienced trauma during this ongoing situation. Moreover, we should extend that same empathy to their teachers.
I hope the pandemic has reminded us that our priority should be our kids’ mental, emotional, and physical health. They need to know that it’s more important to rest than to solve equations, and to socialize than to ace report cards. Positive peer interactions outweigh the importance of perfect research papers. We should be encouraging them to do their best while also providing ample support. Striving for excellence shouldn’t come at the cost of their wellbeing.
I know some might argue that while this approach is fine for younger children, it’s different for high schoolers. Preparing older kids for life post-graduation is indeed essential. As a former college educator, I’ve seen students struggle when they lacked independence. However, if all we focus on is academics, we risk neglecting their mental health needs, leading to burnout and stress.
Children of all ages must understand that their worth extends beyond their academic achievements. I’ve encountered brilliant students who faced mental breakdowns due to excessive pressure, whether from parents or themselves. Though I didn’t teach through a pandemic, I recognize now that holistic wellness is key to true success—no matter what their report cards say.
By easing up on academic pressures, we’re teaching our kids to prioritize their mental health too. It’s not constructive to ignore our emotions and experiences, especially amidst the ongoing challenges of pandemic schooling. We receive constant updates about safety measures and school policies, reflecting the uncertainty we’re all navigating.
There are days when the weight of the pandemic feels heavy. I experience frustration, confusion, and heartbreak, so why shouldn’t my kids feel the same? They wear masks for hours while trying to learn—it’s vital to acknowledge their feelings during this time.
The pandemic has indeed taught us the value of flexibility, which is not a bad lesson. However, demanding more from ourselves and our children at the expense of their mental health is unsustainable. What if we all agreed it’s okay to do the bare minimum—to create space for creativity and rest? What if we offered grace instead of criticism?
I hope that, despite the challenges, this school year becomes a joyful and memorable time for my kids—and yours. I want our children to learn to honor their whole selves, listen to their bodies, and understand that their wellbeing far outweighs their grades. If we lead by example, I believe this can become a reality.
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Summary
As a parent, I’ve decided to prioritize my children’s mental health over academic pressures this school year. The challenges of the pandemic have taught us that emotional wellbeing is just as important, if not more so, than grades. By easing academic expectations and focusing on holistic wellness, we can help our children thrive during these uncertain times.
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