Reflections on the COVID Vaccine: A Former Attorney's Perspective

As a former attorney who spent two years working in Vaccine Court, I have a unique perspective on the COVID vaccine. When I informed my three teenagers that we had secured vaccine appointments at a clinic an hour away, one of them exclaimed, “Thank God!” I chuckled nervously, trying to mask my own concerns about the situation. After a long wait for some semblance of normalcy, it’s unsettling to think that a vaccine is the key to our relief. Marking the dates on my calendar—one appointment and then another 21 days later—left me questioning whether I would truly feel relief on the other side or something entirely different.

A Journey Through Vaccine Court

Before embracing motherhood, I embarked on my legal career in Washington D.C. as a judicial clerk for the U.S. Court of Federal Claims. This two-year role was one of the most influential periods in my life, especially as I worked alongside Chief Special Master Gary Golkiewicz, a key figure in the National Vaccine Injury Compensation Program, often referred to as the “Vaccine Court.” This court provides a specialized venue for claims against the U.S. government related to vaccine injuries under the National Childhood Vaccine Injury Act of 1986. I had the privilege of working there in the mid-1990s, witnessing firsthand the complexities of vaccine-related claims.

The Vaccine Court allows claimants to file injury claims against the government rather than private vaccine manufacturers, streamlining the process for seeking damages. The Vaccine Act was a response to the litigation surge against vaccine manufacturers in the 1970s and 1980s, which disrupted vaccine research and production, leading to a public health crisis. My extensive research during law school on this program revealed its uniqueness, and my findings even earned me a job after I graduated.

Lessons Learned

On my first day at the Vaccine Court, the outgoing law clerk reassured me, “At the end of all this, you won’t be cynical about vaccines or manufacturers. You’ll just understand how complicated it all is.” She was right. My two years there were an eye-opening experience, filled with heartbreaking cases and in-depth discussions about evidence and causation. Although causation was often presumed under specific conditions, the reality of many cases was complex, and the emotions surrounding them were profound.

When I left the court, I was certain of a few things: I wanted to be a litigator, I wanted to be a mother, and I was committed to vaccinating my children—under certain conditions. My kids’ first pediatrician was accommodating, allowing us to space out their vaccinations to ensure their well-being. As more vaccines became mandatory, I continued my careful evaluation of each one.

Facing the COVID Vaccine Decision

Now, as the COVID vaccine is authorized for teenagers, I find myself grappling with a swirl of emotions. The desire for a solution to the pandemic is overwhelming, yet I worry that I might be rushing into decisions for my teens. After discussions with my ex-husband, who is a physician, we reached a consensus that the benefits of vaccination outweighed the risks for our children.

My teenagers are capable of driving themselves to the vaccine clinic, but I insist on accompanying them for the second dose. “I felt foggy after my own second dose,” I explain, eliciting eye rolls. Our drive to the clinic becomes a bonding experience, filled with discussions on everything from music to schoolwork.

Reflecting on the Experience

As we wait the mandatory 15 minutes post-vaccination, my thoughts drift back to my time at the Vaccine Court. While debates about vaccine efficacy continue, the Vaccine Act provided essential relief to many families. It also paved the way for the COVID vaccine’s rapid development by fostering an environment conducive to vaccine research and innovation.

As we head home, I cherish the time spent with my teens and acknowledge the relief that comes with their vaccinations. Yes, there are uncertainties ahead, but I hold onto the hope that comes with being fully vaccinated. My first day at the Vaccine Court echoes in my mind: “You’ll just understand how complicated it all is.”

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Summary: As a former litigator who worked in Vaccine Court, I reflect on the complexities of vaccines, especially in light of the COVID vaccine for teenagers. My experiences have shaped my views on vaccination, leading me to carefully consider the implications for my children. Despite my concerns, I find relief in their vaccination, cherishing the moments spent with them during this pivotal time.