Reflections on Vaccination: A Former Lawyer's Perspective

As a former lawyer who dedicated two years to Vaccine Court, I have a unique perspective on the COVID vaccine.

When I shared the news of securing vaccine appointments for my teenagers, one of them exclaimed in relief. I chuckled about it being the Pfizer vaccine, a lighthearted attempt to mask my own apprehensions. After waiting so long for a reprieve from the pandemic, it’s surreal that a vaccine is what stands between us and a return to normalcy. As I mark the dates on my calendar—one dose followed by another three weeks later—I’m left wondering if I will truly feel relief afterward or something entirely different.

My Journey to Vaccine Court

Before becoming a mother of three teens, I embarked on my legal career as a judicial clerk in the U.S. Court of Federal Claims. That two-year experience significantly shaped my life, particularly my time with Chief Special Master Gary Golkiewicz, who was instrumental in the National Vaccine Injury Compensation Program, known as Vaccine Court. The court serves a unique role in handling claims related to vaccine injuries under the National Childhood Vaccine Injury Act of 1986. This legislation was a response to a surge of lawsuits against vaccine manufacturers that stymied vaccine production, posing a public health risk.

I conducted extensive research on this topic during law school, ultimately receiving an A for my efforts. That paper led me to my position in Vaccine Court. On my first day, the outgoing law clerk assured me that I would come to understand the complexities of vaccines rather than become cynical about them.

Insights from Vaccine Court

Over those two years, I gained invaluable insights. I traveled across the country, hearing cases from families who suffered after receiving childhood vaccines. The emotional weight of their stories was profound. The court’s framework simplified the process for claims, allowing families to seek relief from their pain, even when the science may not have supported their claims.

Deciding to Vaccinate My Children

When it came time for my own children to be vaccinated, I approached the decision with caution. My first pediatrician was understanding and allowed me to space out vaccine appointments. With new vaccines continuously added to the schedule, I remain diligent and informed.

However, the emotions stirred by the availability of the COVID vaccine for teens were unexpected. I yearned for a solution to the pandemic, but I was also apprehensive about acting too quickly. After discussions with my ex-husband, a physician, we concluded that vaccination was the best course for our children. This agreement felt significant, especially given our differing views on many topics.

My teens, capable of driving themselves, headed to the clinic for their first dose with their father. For the second dose, I insisted on accompanying them. I explained my own experience of feeling foggy post-vaccination; I wanted to err on the side of caution. During the drive, we engaged in lively conversations about music, school, and summer plans—a welcome distraction from the gravity of the moment.

Reflecting on the Experience

While waiting after the vaccinations, I reflected on my years in Vaccine Court. The legislation that established the court not only provided a safety net for families but also paved the way for the rapid development of the COVID vaccine. As my children received their shots, I felt a renewed appreciation for that time in my life.

Driving back home, I cherished the time spent with my teens, grateful for the opportunities that vaccination opens up for them—sports, camps, and school activities. Mixed with my lingering worries, there was an undeniable sense of relief. I hold on to that feeling, recalling the wise words from my early days in Vaccine Court: “You won’t become cynical about vaccines; you’ll just understand how complex it all is.”

Conclusion

In summary, my experience in Vaccine Court has shaped my understanding of vaccination. The recent decision to vaccinate my teenagers against COVID-19 has brought up a mix of emotions, but ultimately, it represents a step towards a post-pandemic world filled with opportunities.