Since 2017, my doctor has consistently advised me: combining talk therapy with my prescriptions for anxiety and depression will yield the best results. Ugh. The thought of going to therapy made me want to stomp my feet like a child. I’d rather tackle chores, fold laundry, or even binge-watch my daughter’s favorite YouTube videos than face a therapist.
For years, I had perfected the art of burying every uncomfortable emotion. Why should I disrupt that? My resistance to change is akin to a relative who meticulously saves wrapping paper to avoid waste. I can’t judge; I might have a collection of occasion bags I reuse for gifts.
I realize I’m not doing a great job of promoting therapy, but hear me out. I’m sharing this because I understand every hesitation you might have about seeking help. I told myself my issues weren’t severe enough and feared the embarrassment of revealing my thoughts to a stranger. What if they thought I was just making excuses? Deep down, I was terrified of the possibility that therapy might not be the solution I was hoping for.
Understanding Therapy Outcomes
There are countless types of therapy. So where do you start? First, consider what you hope to achieve from therapy. I remember when my therapist, Dr. Taylor*, first posed this question. Wait, what? Isn’t it your job to help me? Unfortunately, that’s not how it works. Scary Mommy consulted therapist Jacob Kountz for insights into common concerns that deter people from therapy.
It’s your journey, and only you can define your desired outcomes. Some individuals seek therapy to manage their mental health, while others aim to control their anger or maintain stability. There’s no wrong reason to pursue therapy. I reluctantly decided to go when I realized my medication alone wasn’t enough support. Just as you might take an aspirin for a headache, it can provide temporary relief, but without addressing the underlying issue, the problem persists.
I hesitated because I was unsure what to expect. I even worried about whether I would connect with my therapist. Jacob emphasized that everyone has different levels of comfort when it comes to building trust. Some expect to click immediately, while others may take a few sessions to decide if they’re a good match. Personally, I spoke to one other therapist before settling with Dr. Taylor.
I remember my first encounter with her. New year, new beginnings—I finally decided to give it a chance. Due to the pandemic, our initial sessions were virtual. I was so anxious during technical difficulties that I almost gave up. Clearly, I thought, this was a sign that therapy wasn’t meant for me. Yes, I can be a bit dramatic. Yet, somehow, I found myself logging on again the following week. And guess what? It turned out just fine.
Still Unsure?
While I believe therapy is as vital as any physical health appointment, I’m no doctor, so I can’t make claims. The truth is, you don’t need to have faced a life-altering event to pursue therapy. During my conversation with Jacob, he highlighted an essential point: “Therapy encourages you to live the life you’ve always envisioned. It can address some of the darkest moments, but once you navigate through them and develop new skills and boundaries, life begins to feel fulfilling.”
There you have it—words from a therapist who understands both sides of the process. Ultimately, I’m not here to persuade you to go to therapy. I want to empower you to take steps toward your best life. By sharing my journey, I hope to provide support. Whatever reservations you have about therapy are completely normal, but don’t let that melodramatic voice in your head hold you back. Each of our paths will look different, but the truth remains: we all deserve a joyful life (not to be confused with a perfect one) and nothing less.
*Dr. Taylor’s name has been changed for privacy reasons.
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Summary
Therapy can be a transformative experience, even if it seems daunting. By understanding your goals and being open to the process, you can find a supportive environment to explore your feelings. Everyone has their reasons for seeking therapy, and it’s perfectly normal to have reservations. Remember, you deserve a fulfilling life.
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