Recently, I enjoyed dinner with some friends who were buzzing about a show called “The White Lotus.” They insisted it was a must-watch, and I promised to check it out. They also highly recommended “Mare of Easttown,” which I should definitely see.
However, when I returned home and had the chance to choose a new show, I found myself gravitating towards a familiar series that my partner and I had started watching together. It was a show he adored but never got to finish due to his illness. Since his passing, I’ve re-watched this series more times than I care to admit.
It wasn’t until a fellow widow in my support group mentioned her own experience with re-watching a sitcom that I realized the emotional depth behind my choices. I understood then that my preference for these old shows wasn’t just about being too lazy to search for something new; it was about nostalgia. More importantly, it represented comfort and a sense of stability in a chaotic world, especially as a single parent navigating life after loss in a pandemic.
The Nostalgia Factor
Nostalgia is defined as a longing for the past, a feeling of homesickness. I learned that home isn’t just a physical space—it’s the presence of someone who makes you feel understood and safe. My husband was my home, and after his passing, I felt that loss deeply. Escaping into an old show provides a brief respite, allowing me to forget that my true home is gone.
The Comfort Aspect
It seems I’m not alone in seeking solace through re-watching familiar shows. Psychologist Dr. Lily Grant explains that revisiting the same content can reinforce a sense of order in the world and provide a primal sense of safety. This affirmation is something I desperately need after losing my husband. During those twenty-two minutes of an old sitcom, I regain a semblance of security and routine.
The Predictability Comfort
The first time I watched these shows, they were fresh and new. Each subsequent viewing uncovered details I had missed before. Now, after multiple viewings, there are no surprises left. The predictability of these narratives is a gift in a year filled with uncertainty. Watching the same show feels like muting the overwhelming demands of solo parenting amid global crises.
The Time Machine Effect
I’ve previously discussed how grief impacts my ability to engage with new media. I still struggle to dive into new books or shows. But old favorites feel like reuniting with a cherished friend. While I recognize that living in the past isn’t healthy, I allow myself these moments to relive a time that brought me joy. My life has changed in many ways—new home, new job, and new relationships—but sometimes I long for the comfort of who I used to be, a person I loved and didn’t want to lose.
One day, I might finally watch “The White Lotus” and “Mare of Easttown.” Until then, in the challenging landscape of solo parenting and ongoing crises, I’m thankful for the comfort and familiarity of old shows.
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In summary, re-watching familiar shows has become a comforting ritual for me, providing a safe space amidst the chaos of life after loss. It offers a sense of nostalgia, predictability, and emotional solace that I deeply crave.
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