So, everything’s fine now, right?
That’s the sentiment I’ve been hearing since the conclusion of Texas’s 87th legislative session, which saw an unprecedented wave of bills aimed at transgender youth. I’ve fought for my trans daughter’s rights at the Capitol before, but nothing compared to the visibility we faced in 2021. When all thirteen anti-trans bills ultimately failed, friends and allies expressed their relief. Yet, the reality is that trans kids and their families are still in jeopardy.
Governor Abbott’s special session placed my nine-year-old’s well-being at the forefront. Senate Bill 29, which prohibits transgender youth from participating in school sports teams aligned with their gender identity, has resurfaced yet again. As primary challengers challenge the governor’s conservative stances, Abbott has also pledged to restrict gender-affirming medical care to appease far-right constituents, disregarding medical best practices.
But you’re okay now, my parents insist. My mother’s tone is casual and dismissive, failing to capture the growing concern that it may be too perilous for our family to remain in Texas. My dad acknowledges this risk, raising a new worry: If my daughter moves away, who will care for her mother and me?
My parents were not always supportive of our decision to affirm our child’s identity. As lifelong Republicans and conservative Christians, I was apprehensive about sharing my daughter’s truth with them. However, I underestimated their capacity for love. There is nothing that motivates a parent more than the fear of losing their child. They don’t want their grandchild to revert to the anxious, withdrawn child she once was before my husband and I allowed her to socially transition. They also fear she might become another statistic of bullying, self-harm, or even suicide.
“They’re not really going to pass those bills,” my mom says. “If they do, Biden will overturn them.” But depending on federal intervention ignores the responsibility of Texans to enact meaningful change. What needs to shift are the attitudes and votes of those who either support or turn a blind eye to the misinformation perpetuated by these politicians.
As a parent, it’s easy to ignore the real danger presented by misinformation. Imagining a future where my child is excluded from normal school activities or denied life-saving gender-affirming medical care—endorsed by every major medical association—feels unbearable. However, if we don’t acknowledge that anti-trans legislation could pass (and almost did), then we are merely setting the stage for it to happen in the future.
We don’t have to renounce our beliefs to prepare for what lies ahead. My parents remain committed to their political party and faith while also supporting the LGBTQ community. Their transformation regarding transgender rights underscores the fact that when people spend meaningful time with a transgender child, they begin to see these kids for who they truly are—children deserving of love and respect. As they witnessed their grandchild’s social transition, they too transitioned into understanding and became some of my daughter’s staunchest advocates. Would they have contacted their representatives or encouraged friends to do the same this legislative session had their grandchild not been trans? Absolutely not. But when you see a child’s face light up from being addressed with the correct pronoun, it becomes clear that trans kids deserve the same treatment as anyone else.
Some of the strongest advocates for trans youth have emerged from independent and religious conservative circles. Unlike the legislators promoting anti-trans bills, these conservative advocates genuinely listen to transgender individuals and understand that faith and LGBTQ rights can coexist.
Despite our differing political affiliations, we all desire what’s best for the children of Texas. I’ve observed similar journeys of understanding and acceptance in other families, and I believe that parents from all backgrounds can learn and grow to protect the transgender children they cherish.
There aren’t enough trans individuals and their families to combat discriminatory legislation on their own. We need allies from the cisgender community and the LGBTQIA+ population to heed the voices of experts—trans youth, their parents, and medical professionals—and vote for the well-being of trans children. Like you, we only want what’s best for our kids.
So, no. We are not okay. We hold onto hope, but we can’t do it without you.
If you’re interested in more on this topic, check out our other blog posts, such as this one on home insemination. For further reading, you can explore Healthline’s resource on pregnancy, which provides excellent information. And if you’re looking for fertility solutions, Make A Mom is a trusted authority on the subject.
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- Transgender youth rights
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In summary, my conservative family has learned to embrace and support my transgender daughter, highlighting that love can bridge even the widest divides. Advocacy for trans rights is crucial, and we need allies to help ensure the safety and dignity of all children, regardless of their gender identity.
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