As the school year approaches, my emotions are anything but calm. In previous years, I would eagerly anticipate the return of quiet days, where I could work uninterrupted while my kids were in school. This year, however, is different. Now, I’m gripped by fear.
I find myself lying next to my son as he drifts off to sleep, gently tracing my fingers along his lashes and breathing in the familiar scent of his hair, desperately trying to hold on to these moments of safety and health. At the most unexpected times, dread washes over me—I can be making a peanut butter sandwich and suddenly feel a chilling wave of terror. Just the other day, I had to pause, grip the kitchen counter, and take a few deep breaths to steady myself.
I realize I might sound overly dramatic. I know that the worst-case scenario this school year would be my child contracting COVID-19. Statistically, they are likely to recover, and sending them to school isn’t the same as sending them into a war zone. Yet, it feels that way.
Let Me Explain
I have two sons: one a fully vaccinated teenager, and the other a fourth grader who isn’t eligible for the vaccine yet. Last year, we opted for remote learning, and our family faced the challenges of isolation. It took a toll on my children’s mental health. However, at that time, staying home felt like the safest choice with the pandemic still in full swing.
When my husband, my teenager, and I were fully vaccinated in June, and COVID numbers were low, the idea of sending my kids back to school seemed promising. Many adults and teens in our area were vaccinated, and I was relieved to see the school district effectively manage COVID protocols with little in-school transmission.
By the start of summer, I was ready for my kids to return to school, even my unvaccinated son. After a year of remote learning, they were eager to reconnect with peers. I felt reassured that the risk was manageable given the low case numbers and the school’s track record.
But that sense of security has eroded since the Delta variant emerged. COVID cases surged in my community, even among the fully vaccinated. Outbreaks at local camps began to surface, and soon reports indicated that children were significant spreaders of the Delta variant. My news feed was flooded with heartbreaking images of hospitalized children struggling to breathe, and stories of young lives lost.
As a parent, the thought of my child in such dire straits is unbearable. I’m well aware that my children’s school district is still committed to safety measures like universal masking, ventilation, social distancing, and hand hygiene, all of which should help mitigate their risk of contracting the virus. Yet, Delta feels different—it’s so much more transmissible. I find it hard to trust that even the best protocols can keep my kids safe.
While I know that, statistically, a small percentage of children are hospitalized (less than 2%) and an even smaller number die (with a death rate of 0.00%-0.03% among kids), the reality of long-haul symptoms is alarming. Most children recover, but the fear lingers.
In just six days, I will send my kids back to school, including my little one who hasn’t interacted with peers in 18 months. For now, his mental health takes precedence over my worries about his physical safety. I trust the school’s safety measures, and rationally, I understand that the odds of something terrible happening are slim.
Yet, my rational side often takes a backseat when it comes to my kids. Currently, I’m a bundle of anxiety, oscillating between hope and the feeling that I should keep my children indoors indefinitely.
Frustration with Society
What frustrates me most is where we find ourselves as a society. Yes, COVID-19 is a virus that spreads, and yes, the Delta variant is alarmingly contagious. However, we have effective tools at our disposal—vaccines and masks—that can slow the spread. Too many people seem to have given up, allowing the virus to wreak havoc just as children are returning to classrooms.
I’m panicking, and many parents I know are feeling the same way. This didn’t have to happen. We could have prioritized our children’s safety, implementing strict measures until all kids could be vaccinated. But we didn’t.
As September arrives, parents are filled with trepidation, bracing for the worst. It feels as though our children’s well-being is not a priority.
Further Reading
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Summary
As the new school year begins, parents are overwhelmed with anxiety about sending their children back to school amid rising COVID-19 cases, particularly with the Delta variant. Despite knowing the safety protocols in place, the fear of illness looms large, especially for unvaccinated children. Many parents feel frustrated by the lack of urgency in society regarding safety measures, leading to a sense of dread as they prepare for the school year.
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