When I was a kid, my grandparents used to take me to a local park filled with waterfowl, affectionately known as the “duck pond.” Armed with stale bread, we’d enjoy feeding the quacking mallards. But then, the Canada geese would show up. They’d honk loudly, spread their wings, and charge at us. My brother and I would throw the bread in a panic, trying to distract them while we made our escape. It felt like we were living in a scene from Jurassic Park, where the velociraptors had escaped. Those geese had figured out that small humans were a source of snacks.
Make no mistake: Canada geese are notorious for their aggressive behavior. As urban areas provided them with lush lawns and fewer predators, they stopped their migrations to the Arctic each summer. Whether they’re savvy or just plain lazy, their numbers have surged to around seven million in the U.S., thanks to protections under the Migratory Bird Act. That’s seven million honking, pooping, intimidating birds.
Geese: Nature’s Terrifying Guardians
They’re everywhere! From office parks to parking lots, Canada geese nest in places you’d least expect. You really don’t want them nesting near you, as they become fiercely protective of their adorable goslings. One Reddit user shared a story of a close encounter, and it’s not the only one.
The truth is, geese are surprisingly intelligent. A river guide once noted that unless you want to risk injury, it’s best to avoid feeding them. They can be quite the formidable adversaries.
The Messy Reality of Geese
Each Canada goose produces about one kilogram of droppings daily. Considering they weigh between 3 to 9 kilograms, that’s a shocking proportion of their body weight! Imagine if the average American woman were to excrete about nineteen pounds daily—an amount that defies explanation. This waste contaminates our waterways and can lead to severe illness if ingested. So, knowing about this is crucial, but when it comes to geese, knowledge might not protect you.
The Nesting Nightmare
Geese are known to nest in the most unexpected places, including areas frequented by children. One unfortunate individual learned this the hard way. As for me, when I was sixteen, I once tried to pick up a cute gosling, only to be charged by an angry parent. The wingspan of an angry Canada goose is impressive and intimidating. I turned and ran, barefoot, across a field of goose droppings, narrowly escaping the wrath of a feathered dinosaur.
Not Just a Threat to Humans
Geese are territorial not only towards humans but also among themselves. Their fights resemble scenes from street brawls, and they don’t hold back. YouTube is full of evidence showcasing their chaotic skirmishes. They fiercely protect their young and can even be a threat to pets.
In fact, people have started using geese as guard animals due to their aggressive nature. They can scare off trespassers faster than a pit bull, but they don’t discriminate. It’s a problem if you have guests since they will attack anyone, including you.
The Urgency of Not Feeding Geese
Feeding geese conditions them to approach humans for food, similar to how alligators or bears might. However, this practice can harm the geese themselves, leading to health issues like deformities from improper diets. Interestingly, about 20% of some goose species form same-sex partnerships, which appear to be more affectionate than other pairings. Pause for a moment to appreciate that, but remember: geese are still ferocious feathered dinosaurs that can attack you, your pets, or even each other at the slightest provocation.
For more information on pregnancy and home insemination, check out this excellent resource on infertility from the CDC. If you’re curious about enhancing fertility, consider looking into supplements from Make A Mom.
In Summary
Canada geese may look charming, but they’re actually aggressive creatures that can pose significant risks to people, pets, and the environment. Their nesting habits and territorial behavior make them a menace, not to mention the health hazards associated with their droppings. It’s best to admire them from a distance and definitely avoid feeding them.
Leave a Reply