By: Jamie Taylor
Updated: Sep. 12, 2021
Originally Published: Sep. 12, 2021
If you struggled to find time for “self-care” before the pandemic, the current situation makes it feel nearly impossible. The days when parents could count on relatives to look after a sick child in a pinch are long gone. Many small businesses have closed due to staffing shortages, while others are asking employees to work exhausting hours to make up for the loss. Healthcare systems are overwhelmed, and family members needing care are often left waiting.
Amidst this chaos, we frequently hear the well-meaning reminder: “Don’t forget to take care of yourself! Your mental health is important!” It’s a sentiment we’re all aware of, yet it feels increasingly unattainable. We are stretched thin, caught in a relentless cycle of trying to catch up with the added challenges that COVID has brought. What used to be a minor inconvenience now feels monumental. When a child falls ill, it’s often a prolonged ordeal, and our concerns for their health have escalated. COVID exposure has drained families emotionally, physically, and financially. For many, finding time for even the essential tasks is a challenge, let alone for what society now calls “self-care.”
We understand the importance of self-care and recognize our worthiness of it. However, the concept of self-care can often feel unrealistic, setting standards that vary greatly from one individual to another. These idealized notions of self-care widen the gap between those who have resources and those who don’t, and it’s crucial to remember that the term originally emerged in the medical field in the 1950s to promote dignity among patients, not as an invitation to indulge in extravagant experiences.
The pandemic has stripped away the glamor of self-care, leading us to appreciate the small joys, like enjoying a cup of tea or sitting quietly on the porch during a rainstorm. But the harsh reality is that not everyone can afford these moments of respite, whether due to lack of resources or overwhelming responsibilities.
In a recent interview, Dr. Emma Roberts, a psychiatrist, claimed that the notion of self-care has shifted the burden of mental well-being onto individuals rather than providing a supportive social framework. While I’m not dismissing the value of self-care practices, I acknowledge that for some, these suggestions can feel like added pressure—just another list of tasks that may go unfulfilled, causing further feelings of inadequacy.
Each day, we rise with expectations and often retire with them unmet. The cycle continues until we reach a breaking point. Some of us simply cannot take on another task or suggestion to prioritize ourselves. Even when we manage to carve out time, it frequently feels insufficient. Self-care is not a comprehensive solution; what we truly seek is inner peace, which eludes us amidst the turmoil.
Finding peace is not about ticking off a checklist; it’s a state of mind, a choice rather than a reward. In the chaos of the pandemic, achieving peace feels elusive, but perhaps just surviving is the best form of self-care we can offer ourselves right now.
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In summary, the pandemic has challenged our understanding of self-care, revealing its flaws and the pressures it places on individuals. The notion that everyone can engage in self-care is a myth; what we really need is to find balance and peace amidst the chaos that surrounds us.
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