When I tried to watch Home Alone last holiday season with my nine-year-old daughter and seven-year-old twins, I didn’t foresee having to switch it off a third of the way through because they were scrambling into my lap, shrieking in terror. The comedic premise of being left alone and battling burglars, along with a perhaps menacing old neighbor, was simply too overwhelming for them, despite my assurances that the old man was actually a good guy. I should have predicted this reaction; after all, the snow monster in Frozen, the escapades in Jumanji, and the entirety of Coco were all too intense for my sensitive kids. What many consider family-friendly films often become too frightening for my little ones.
Growing up, I watched Scooby-Doo, Gremlins, Ghostbusters, E.T., and Nightmare on Elm Street—classics that scared us but didn’t seem to bother the adults. As a parent now, I wouldn’t dream of exposing my children to the same films I enjoyed at their age; I simply don’t have the patience for nightmares. Even age-appropriate spooky films get the boot. Last Halloween, we settled for watching Casper as our “scary” movie.
When a film is deemed non-scary, there’s always a scene that requires me to explain it to them. Sometimes we end up bailing altogether. I take full responsibility for the trauma I inflicted on my oldest during The NeverEnding Story. How did I forget about that horse scene? Right, early childhood trauma can be hard to remember. My apologies, kid.
Some children are naturally more sensitive than others, and that’s completely normal; some find it hard to distinguish fiction from reality. They can’t shake the notion that the villain might actually harm them or that a parent could leave or even die. Seriously, Disney? I didn’t think films like Toy Story or Lady and the Tramp would be issues.
Sierra Filucci, the executive parenting editor at Common Sense Media, notes, “Grotesque faces or anything beyond relatable, cute characters can be unsettling to kids, yet adults often don’t recognize it.” Instead of dismissing their fears, we should acknowledge their feelings. Just because we aren’t scared doesn’t mean they aren’t, and belittling their emotions is not helpful. I’ve paused films to explain what’s about to happen, reassured them that characters are safe, and highlighted the silliness of what scares them. Sometimes that’s sufficient, but other times we have to switch to a different film.
Before even selecting a movie, I consult Common Sense Media for guidance. After narrowing down our choices, we watch the trailers multiple times to gauge the content. I read the descriptions and remind them that we can always stop if it becomes too much.
Interestingly, my kids have vivid imaginations, and some of what they watch translates into their playtime. They adore hide-and-seek and spy games, engage in wild pool noodle battles, and create intricate Nerf gun skirmishes. My son loves drawing monsters and action scenes, yet when it comes to seeing them on screen, he wants nothing to do with it. Despite having many toy swords and ninja stars, he’s the first to back out when fight scenes arise in a film.
Filiucci also remarks, “Parents are often surprised by what ends up freaking their kids out.” My son enjoyed The Mandalorian, filled with bizarre creatures and blasters, so I thought Iron Man would be a fitting introduction to superhero films that didn’t involve Lego figures. Nope. It had “too much fighting.” And unlike The Mandalorian, it lacked an adorable character like Grogu to lighten the mood.
My daughters managed to get through Iron Man knowing there were two sequels; they felt reassured that Iron Man would survive. They’re willing to try the second film, but my son prefers revisiting Paw Patrol. That’s the type of gentle, predictable film my kids gravitate towards, especially my son, making it challenging to agree on a movie. Finding one that excites me too is even harder. My kids lean towards Air Bud, Space Jam, and Paw Patrol, which is completely fine.
Choosing a movie takes extra time and effort, but I’m in no hurry to desensitize my children. I don’t believe they should have to endure something uncomfortable. Research by Dr. Joanne Cantor and Dr. Kristen Harrison indicates that children who unintentionally view frightening content, especially younger kids, are at a greater risk for long-lasting fear reactions. No thanks.
I’d prefer to watch something deeper, but it’s not worth traumatizing my kids for a more complex storyline. Honestly, it’s heartwarming that they aren’t ready for some films their peers might enjoy. Their innocence will fade soon enough, so I’m more than happy to keep family movie night enjoyable for my little “scaredy cats.”
For more insights on family dynamics and parenting, check out this related post here. Additionally, for those interested in home insemination options, this resource provides valuable information. For further reading on fertility treatments, consider visiting NHS, an excellent resource for pregnancy and home insemination.
Leave a Reply