There’s a neighbor down the street whom I’ve never particularly liked—let’s be honest about that right from the start. When my family first moved to the neighborhood, I was a new mom juggling a baby and expecting my second. Shortly after, we adopted a dog, welcomed our second child, and then I became pregnant again.
We exchanged polite waves and smiles, but I could never attend her gatherings. Kids weren’t welcome, and she and her husband had no experience with them. In our early chats, she made it clear how much she valued her high-powered career, insisting she could never stay at home with children. Her exact words? “I’d rather die.”
In our quiet neighborhood, she enjoyed hosting meetings to impose her ideas on everyone. From insisting we keep our garage doors shut to suggesting we all paint our front doors the same color for uniformity, she even once proposed that only cats should be allowed, no dogs.
No thanks. My husband and I worked hard to buy our home and wanted the freedom to make our own choices. If we wanted rules, we would’ve opted for a condo association with dues. I made that clear.
Fast forward nearly twenty years, and she confronted me on my doorstep about my absence from her latest gathering, accusing me of being unfriendly and unneighborly. The truth is, I don’t want to go, and that’s as good as saying I don’t have time.
After her unsolicited lecture, I had to cut the conversation short. Moms simply don’t have time for nonsense. We’re already stretched thin dealing with our kids (who can test our patience like no one else) and have no room left for additional drama.
If you’re a mom, you likely find yourself lying awake at night, thinking, “I’ve had it up to here today, and I can’t take on anyone else’s issues.” As a mom, you’re always in protective mode, putting your family first. If someone tries to stir up trouble or create unnecessary stress, you simply don’t have the capacity to entertain it.
In the world of motherhood, we’re constantly navigating our own challenges—be it kids throwing tantrums, sleepless nights, or any number of daily hurdles. So why would we add someone else’s drama to the mix?
Moms possess an innate bullshit detector—sensitive enough to sniff out negativity from a mile away, and we’re not hesitant to tell it to go away. People often think our reluctance to engage stems from being overworked, tired, or stressed, which is true. But the real reason is that we’ve gained the confidence to cut out the nonsense.
We want to show our kids that we don’t have to accept disrespect, manipulation, or time-wasting behavior from others. We’re all busy, but as moms, we are unapologetic in making that clear.
Remember, you are a mother. You don’t need to tolerate anyone’s nonsense—not even a tiny annoyance someone might try to throw your way. If you’re like most mothers, you already have plenty to manage.
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