As a mother who has experienced the heartache of losing a child, I often approach films that tackle the theme of child loss with skepticism. When I first learned about the Netflix movie The Starling, my expectations were cautious.
The film revolves around Lilly (played by Sarah Monroe) and her husband, Jack Harper (portrayed by David Ellis), navigating the aftermath of their infant daughter, Emma’s, tragic death. A year following their loss, we find Jack in a psychiatric facility after a suicide attempt, leaving Lilly to manage their country home and deal with her grief on her own.
Lilly is encouraged by Jack’s counselor to seek support and contacts Dr. Frank Lane, played by the charismatic Jordan Chase. However, upon her visit, she discovers that Dr. Frank has transitioned from a psychologist to a veterinarian. As Lilly grapples with her past, she reveals that Emma’s death was due to SIDS, but without the comfort of a traditional therapy session, she returns home feeling more isolated.
A pivotal moment in Lilly’s journey comes when she reflects on her neglected garden. It symbolizes her internal struggle as she realizes that life continues around her, despite her profound sorrow. The arrival of a pesky starling serves as a constant reminder of her grief, yet it also leads to an unexpected bond with Dr. Frank, resulting in a unique friendship filled with what I would call “unconventional therapy.”
While the film features an ensemble cast, it received mixed reviews, with some critics claiming it trivializes the couple’s grief. However, I did not find the depiction of child loss to be insensitive.
Having lost a child in a similar manner, I related deeply to the dynamic between Lilly and Jack. The uncertainty that comes with SIDS leaves many parents questioning everything, often leading to misplaced blame. I appreciated the film’s blend of humor and pain, as laughter can be a vital part of healing. Jack’s use of dark humor in the mental health facility resonated with me; it’s a coping mechanism that many parents, including myself, can understand.
Traditionally, Hollywood showcases mothers as the primary figures drowning in grief, but The Starling highlights that fathers experience loss just as intensely. The couple’s journey emphasizes the need to reconnect after such a traumatic event, showing that grief can manifest in various ways and is not always overt.
The film’s setting, a year after their loss, portrays a more nuanced reality of grief. It’s not always about the visible signs of mourning; sometimes, parents must find a way to pick up the pieces without a dramatic resolution. Many parents live with unanswered questions, and moving forward often means taking each day as it comes.
For those who criticize The Starling as an awkward exploration of grief, I would remind them that grief itself is often uncomfortable and unpredictable.
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In summary, The Starling offers a thoughtful exploration of grief that resonated with me as a bereaved mother. It captures the complexities of loss and healing while challenging traditional portrayals of parental grief.
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